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What are your thoughts on announcing?

  1. ElbieKay

    pomegranate / 3231 posts

    I txted my best friend the instant I got a BFP. We told our immediate family at 11 weeks on my dad's birthday. I told my management team at around 12 or 13 weeks. And that is when we started telling friends opportunistically.

    We waited til around 20 weeks to say anything on FB.

    I had a missed miscarriage at about 7 weeks, about six months before I got pregnant with my son. Very few people know about it now, and I told almost no one about it when it happened. Our parents still do not know. I am glad I did not share that news.

  2. yellowbeach

    nectarine / 2648 posts

    Happy to find this thread - I've been giving this some thought just this week. Today I am 5w2d and still awaiting my first us. We had told a few people we were doing IVF (parents, sister, 3 best friends). They knew our transfer and beta dates, so of course they were curious about the results, and wanted to be there emotionally for me either way. That was about 10 people (including DHs brothers) who knew pretty much right after we found out.

    Shortly after, I had to tell my boss and the person at work who makes the schedule so that I could shift some things around to plan for April 2017.

    I'm sure it's because it's my first, but I am dying to tell more people. The reality is that every day at work I seem to have to tell at least one person - yesterday we had a patient with CMV, so I had to ask my co-worker to switch patients with me. My hubby and I work together, and most of our friends work with us. If we don't tell a little early, I'm afraid by the time 12 weeks rolls around everyone will have been notified in a trickle, stealing away some of the surprise, leaving no room for a big announcement.

    I've never been pregnant before, so I haven't had a MC (knock on wood), so I can't say for sure how I would feel if people knew - but... I think, maybe since I'm in health care and know how common it is, I don't think it's a shame or anything hush hush. But like I said, never been there.

    But when we do tell (leaning towards ~9-10 weeks), I'll certainly post a little something on social media. It's part of my job, and I'm very active both personally and professionally. I definitely understand why so many people don't want to announce there though.

  3. PeaceLily

    apricot / 360 posts

    This is really interesting! I'm newly pregnant with my first (around 6 weeks) and we decided to tell our immediate families a couple of days after we found out I was pregnant, so I was just over 4 weeks. I didn't want to wait since we were so excited to tell our families (parents/siblings) and waiting made me feel like I was expecting something to go wrong with the pregnancy. If anything were to go wrong, we would tell our immediate families anyway.

    We are holding off on telling extended family, friends and co-workers until I'm further along. Neither of us have any social media accounts, so no posting on facebook or anything like that.

  4. Mrs D

    grapefruit / 4545 posts

    My circle of friends seem to start telling people around 8-10w; announce on FB more like 12-16w. I have several friends who have struggled with losses - they seem to wait until 20w to go FB public.

    For me personally - we told our parents, siblings and closest friends as soon as we wanted (I texted my BFF the minute I peed on a stick...). We announced with DD1 at 13w (just after NT) and DD2 around 16w. I am personally of the opinion that I am comfortable telling anyone I'm pregnant that I'd be comfortable sharing miscarriage news with. SO I gradually shared with friends starting once I had been to the Dr to confirm...

  5. MoonMoon

    pomegranate / 3392 posts

    My comfort level:

    Only DH and I knew for the first 12 weeks or so.

    Then announced to 4 local friends (2 couples) and one long distance friend

    Told my parents at 19 weeks (waited to see them in person)

    After that, called/texted several more friends to tell them

    In-laws around 23 weeks (were going to tell them a bit earlier at Xmas, but bil & sil "scooped" us with their pregnancy so we waited a bit more)

    At work, people found out by around 28+ weeks when I was showing noticeably

    Social media: never

    DH & I were in no hurry to share, loved taking our time and being in a private bubble. Cut down on unwanted advice/comments too!

  6. Chillybear

    pomegranate / 3032 posts

    First Pregnancy: We didnt tell anyone until week 6 -then we told parents and siblings, week 8ish we told my grandparents, week 11 we told family and close friends, week 13 I told my work, week 19 we shared on Facebook

    Second pregnancy: I told my mom the day i tested, my dad at 5-6 weeks, hubs family at 7 weeks, family and friends as I see them in person starting at 11 weeks, work at 13 weeks, I'm 19 weeks now and we havent put anything on FB yet

  7. MrsRcCar

    grapefruit / 4712 posts

    I announced to family and close friends very quickly after finding out. We never put it out on Facebook until around 20 weeks. We never kept it a secret.

  8. Alba4

    nectarine / 2951 posts

    We announced to parents and siblings after the first ultrasound @ 7/8 weeks (after hearing heartbeat). We told friends @ 12 weeks. I announced on FB @ 20 weeks with #1 and @ 30 weeks with #2.

    Some very close friends knew right away since I've had miscarriages and it was good to talk about my nervous feelings pre 12 weeks.

  9. Ajsmommy

    pomegranate / 3355 posts

    I find this interesting and glad it resurfaced. I agree with the original posting that I feel like now people announce earlier than in the past! I am 13w today and I have 2 friends who are the same as me and they announced weeks before we did.

    I also agree with @Mrs D: that I tell people whom I'd be ok with sharing miscarriage news with.

    With both pregnancies we told parents and a few close friends right away. Announced on FB at 12w/few days after the scan/testing results and that is when work found out too.

    I wanted to wait longer this time around but DH was too excited.

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