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@agold: your milk will come in soon and that's makes things a lot different- she may wake up more then. But some babies definitely need a lot of waking up. I'd undress he and change her diaper every two hours. If you really can't wake her id call the pediatrician.
You have to make the right choice for you re: formula, but when things are tough in the early days I like to remind myself that breastfeeding can be really tough and demanding at first but it gets easier and then it's super convenient. I also remind myself that making up formula bottles doesn't sound like much fun when I'm recovering! -
@katsupgirl: Yyyyaaasssss! She has been on the bratty side since we brought the baby home:( It's slowly getting better but it's gonna take a while:( On top of the screaming she's been acting out or crying or whining like 10X the usual amount.... and it's testing my sleep deprived patience so badly
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@agold: I didn't sit! Hehe. I couldn't sit upright for at least two weeks, there was just no way I could put any extra pressure on my bottom. I spent the entire time in the hospital and those first two weeks laying down in bed or in a reclined position. After the first two weeks I started to sit but only on a boppy. At about the one month mark I could sit without a boppy but not for long periods. On top of the no sitting, I also could hardly walk:( That area was so sore that movement to it hurt. To cope, I took my prescription pain meds like clockwork for an entire month before moving to OTC pain meds. By the way prescription pain meds will constipate you, and you don't want to be constipated, so take stool softener and get some laxatives just in case (I used Phillips milk of magnesia for that first month because it made it so much easier to go). I also didn't cook, didn't clean, and pretty much didn't leave my house for a month, and just tried to rest as much as possible. It was so hard both physically and emotionally. The swelling didn't go down for a while, and DH didn't go anywhere near my lady bits for 3 months. To be honest things didn't feel 100% normal until closer to the 6 month mark. It does get better, it's just extremely hard, and since not a lot of women have this type of tearing I felt really alone:( Send me all your questions or complaints, I can commiserate with you! Also this time I had a 2nd degree tear, light years better than a 3rd degree tear, so there is hope for the future too.
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@agold: my first went 5 hours between feeds the moment she was born. Averages are just averages- babies fall on either end of the scale.
I'd encourage you to call an IBLCE- just cause nurses are "trained" in lactation doesn't mean they truly know their stuff. There are two levels of lc's- and LCs get minimal training and IBLCE are trained and certified. You'll get better help from a IBLCE.
Formula isn't going to fix a lazy eater. But follow your mom instinct. If you want to breastfeed- get the help you deserve!
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@agold: I'm creeping on this thread since I'm due in about a week and a half but if you want any more info on dealing with tears and recovery time, I'd be happy to help. I had a third degree tear and episiotomy with my first so I totally understand how crappy it can be. Feel free to wall me!
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@pwnstar: thanks. I got an appointment today at 130 with her pediatrician. Thank god. They otherwise wouldn't see her until 2 weeks. Is that normal for first baby appointment? So my ped I picked doesn't have privileges at the hospital I delivered at so another pediatrician saw her the day after she was born. I have a full appointment with him tomorrow for baby girl that I may keep. And then still follow up with my pediatrician of choice in two weeks. But in the meantime, I'm so happy for a doctor to see her today!
So I broke down this morning and gave baby girl a tiny bit of enfamil formula. She took it no problem and I felt my breast feeding dreams dying. BUT we took the formula away after a minute or so (is that mean?) and put her to my breast and she latched after a minute!!! She then nursed for over 30 minutes. Two hours later we did the same thing with the other boob. 36 minutes there! Oh thank god. I don't know if this is a good tactic or not, but at least she has food in her tummy. I have no problem with formula. I just wanted to be able to breast feed.
@Silva: I agree hat making formula bottles sounds horrible. I'm already making "diapers" for myself every few hours. And yes, we undress her for feedings. She's such a great breast feeder that I couldn't understand why she's now not eager to latch on like before. (Ha! Before being the 48 hours we've been doing this together!!)
@MrsBeluga: oh my gosh. I'm so glad I have you to talk to about this. I'm really going to try not to sit up. I feel like disability insurance should treat this like a c section and give me two extra weeks pay. It's serious injury! I'm on ice down there instantly and numbing spray and witch hazel pads. I take Motrin and colace (softener) already. I took Norco in the hospital and have called in to my OB for a prescription because I really think I need it to function. I'm so glad you feel it did heel eventually.
@OldpuebloJenn: thank you. So my hospital had a lactation consultant I can do a one on one meeting with for $40. I'm going to try that. Otherwise the girl who did my breast feeding class is also an LC. She's going to be loads more pricey but I'll do it if I need it.
@MrsKoala: thank you for creeping! Later today I'm sure I will hit you up with some questions. I'm so sorry anyone else has to deal with this. But so glad to find some support here.
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OMG. Milk came in and she fed without being tricked by formula. Maybe we are passed cluster feeding and needing tricks. So sorry to come here all dramatic in the middle of the night. This new baby stuff is crazy and intense!!! I'm really learning what works for my baby. Crazy how much different things are with each passing hour.
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@agold: probably not past the cluster feeding.... But maybe a break for a little while!! We just had a two day patch of it right at two weeks. Hang in there, you will figure it all out (as much as any of us have, anyway). The work of early motherhood is figuring out how to trust your decisions- and it's really hard!
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@agold: Such a great update! I bet she was cluster feeding to tell your body it was time to produce milk. I agree with @Silva: that you likely haven't seen the last of cluster feeding just yet (it usually hits again around the 2 week mark). But. With her good latch and your goal to BF, I think you're going to do brilliantly.
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@katsupgirl: Yes, definitely on the intentional loudness of the older sibling! My baby is 6.5 weeks now and the funny thing is that for so long I did everything I could to try to get my older daughter to quiet down and not to be loud so close to the baby, etc., and now that my baby can smile, many times she smiles when her sister gets right in her face with the high volume songs like it's the best part of her day!
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@agold: So glad to see this update! The early days hold so much--so many highs and lows and changes. Hope the pediatrician appt went well.
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Has anyone used gas drops before? My son seems to be in a lot of pain from gas and is waking up screaming every 45 minutes from about 10pm-3am. Has been happening for four nights now, with general fussiness during other times. I think maybe his " witching hours" are happening a little late because after that rough period he sleeps soundly for about three hours...but he seems so uncomfortable, arching his back, crying before burps/toots...he has some reflux symptoms too, so we are considering the drops...
Anyway, just wondering if anyone here had experience with them -
@Silva: yup! I make my own gripe water, I use the fennel seed recipe:
http://lifestyle.iloveindia.com/lounge/how-to-make-gripe-water-at-home-7193.htmlI've never used otc gas drops, but it's worth a try!
Have you tried massage to help with the gas? YouTube has good tutorials. -
@MrsBeluga: @mossyslane: my patience is definitely being tested. I figure he's used to her noise and is going to be her biggest fan. Looking forward to when the older one can reliably entertain the younger one.
@agold: just a reminder that your hormones are doing crazy things so don't worry about being dramatic. I was a mess with my first. Crying, anxious, melting down, overwhelmed. It definitely gets better.
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@katsupgirl: This has been a big issue today. Stop waking the baby!!! I know she's doing it for attention but the more she wakes the baby the more attention he needs and the less she gets. I wish I could make her understand that somehow.
@Silva: We're using them at every feed otherwise we have the same issues, usually around 3am. He definitely burps/farts easier when we use them but doesn't eliminate the issue
@OldpuebloJenn: I never even thought of making my own. Thanks for the link!
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Hi all, sorry I've been MIA, settling in with a new baby is pretty consuming as you all know
A huge congratulations to the ladies who have recently welcomed their bubs!!
We ended up staying in hospital for 8 long days because of some problems with Anna. She spent 90% of her time in the humidicrib which was emotionally really hard for me after a crappy birth.
A few weeks later, we're all doing great. We seem to have lucked out with a calm, easy baby. She sleeps really well, settles herself, and breastfeeding is no problem (after the first painful week)
As for me, I've begun physio and my OB says C-secs a probably a good idea for any future births... long story short, long labors and forceps are shit on your pelvic floor! -
I'm suddenly having auch a hard time getting my baby back to sleep after middle of the night feedings. She is so wide awake
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@mossyslane: That happened here last night, and it was rough. No advice, just commiseration.
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@Umberto: my first was a 60 hour induction that ended with a forceps delivery and a 3rd degree tear... Hang in there!
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@mossyslane: that's when I wake up DH! He can get her down usually with her trying to latch on.
@Silva: I bought them but haven't used them.
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@pwnstar: @Silva: thank you girls for the heads up about potential future cluster feeding episodes! Good to know it can happen so I don't freak out when it does. Hopefully my nipples toughen up by then!!
@mossyslane: the pediatrician appointment did go well!! Thanks for asking. I love the doctor. She made us feel so good. Baby girl has lost 6.6% of her body weight. Doctor said its okay and shouldn't keep happening now that my milk has come in. We made her normal first baby appointment for two weeks from now. Is that when first baby appointments normally happen?
@Silva: I've been talking about gripe water to my husband tonight!! So I picked up something actually called "gripe water" from target but noticed tonight that it says to be used for baby's 2 weeks and older. My baby is only 3 days so I will need to wait. When I was in the waiting room at the pediatricians office, a mom randomly told me about something called "Mylicon" for gassy babies. She said it is at target. I'm going to look into when I get a chance.
@OldpuebloJenn: you are amazing for making your own gripe water!!!
@katsupgirl: hi there!! I haven't even said hello to you yet. So sorry. I came on here and bombarded everyone with my own concerns. Congratulations on your own new baby!! And thank you for not making me feel like a major drama queen. I'm just so concerned about my baby girl all the time.
@Umberto: this is such an interesting update! I'm glad you are home now with your easy baby. Thanks for mentioning that breast feeding got easier after the first painful week. I'm in the midst of the first painful week and and happy to know it's possibly going to get less painful! As for your pelvic floor issues. I forget what happened. I have a 4th degree tear and am really worried about some lasting damage to that area. I have a two week follow up appointment with my OB to hopefully find out some more info. It's the most painful thing I'm dealing with right now. I'm staying in bed all day tomorrow to see if that helps at all.
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@mossyslane: I'm sort of having the same issues!!
Regarding feedings in general. After feeding, my baby seems to like to go into a happy milk coma with her little face on my boob. Tonight we thought we should try to burp her right away. Oh lord. Bad idea. She's so upset and crying for nearly an hour now. Poor husband is rocking her because I can only do so much stuck not moving in bed. And she's throwing up just a tiny tad now that my milk is in (I think that's why)
So do you all let baby stay in the milk coma, or disrupt it to try to burp??
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@agold: definitely try to burp. If she's screaming it's more likely because there is gas or air that needs to come up. She also could still be hungry and wants latched back on!
The mylicon drops are what's called "gas drops". Do you know about bicycle legs and belly massages? Between constant burping and lots of massages I think now at 2 weeks we are getting a handle on the gas and spitting up. She still has gas and spits up but we have a routine to manage.
Day 3 is still SOO early. It sounds lien you're doing everything right and you have a healthy baby. Try to just hang in there. Unfortunately you can't "fix" everything. They are changing so fast.
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@agold: also be prepared that breastfeeding may not get "easy" for most until closer to 4-6 weeks. But now that you're milk is coming in it will be a totally different experience. So don't give up yet.
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@agold: this method (five s) helped DH be able to calm. Although he didn't always have a paci for the suck.
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@pregnantbee: yes, so rough! It's so much easier to wake up for a predictable nurse/diaper change then an indefinite struggle...@T.H.O.U.: good call on enlisting DH!
@agold: That's great that your appt went well--I think everywhere is a bit different. Mine were at 2 days, 1 week, and then a month. And then shots at two months... -
@pregnantbee: @mossyslane: So. For us, it's the second wake up after which my little guy is harder to put back down. So for that wake up/feed, I leave him swaddled while I nurse him, to keep him cozy and drowsy. Then when I put him down (he's in a RNP next to our bed) I rest my hand on his chest for a couple minutes until he settles. I have also considered bringing in a heating pad to put in his RNP while he nurses to keep it warm. (Of course it wouldn't be in there with him--just while he's out). But I haven't needed to try it yet. But that's my plan if I can't get him to settle after the second wake up/feed.
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@pwnstar: Thanks for the tips
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@Umberto: Nice to hear from you. Glad you're all doing so much better now.
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@T.H.O.U.: thank you for that link!!! I actually used it last night because husband was like, "what are those 5 s' that we learned about!!" Hahaha. You read our mind.
Husband and I slept for close to two hours simultaneously last night!!! Hooray for hitting that milestone! Now I'm awake, changed my own diaper, husband still asleep, and I'm watching baby girl wondering when to bring her up to me for a feed!!!! Don't want to destroy the peace I have right now!!!!
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@pregnantbee: Not so much tips as just what we've been doing. It works today--but who knows about tomorrow?! I also think my little guy just happens to be a decent sleeper. Total luck of the draw there. There's so much about parenting over which you have so little control--so much that's a total crap shoot!
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@agold: I wouldn't let her go more than 4 hours without eating. That will change as she gets older. But that's what I would do fo now.
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@pwnstar: thank you! And yes, I woke her at the 4 hour mark.
Speaking of hours between feedings... Do you girls count from when the feeding begins or when the feeding ends? I've been counting from the end.
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@agold: You count from when it begins.
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@agold: You count beginning to beginning. That's how long between feedings.
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@agold: I downloaded the Glow Baby app to keep track of feelings and diapers and I really like it. It's free, if you are interested! It tells you how long ago the last feeding was, which is super helpful because otherwise I'd probably forget
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@pwnstar: Interesting idea about the heat...when we were in the hospital and she had a hard time settling, the night nurse wrapped her in a blanket from the warmer before putting her down and it totally helped. Maybe this would do similarly...
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@agold: thanks for the welcome and no worries. I can't stop worrying about my baby girl and she's not nearly as new. #momlife
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@MrsBeluga: Oh wow! How was recovery for you? Did you have incontinence issues?
@agold: The first week was really hard so hang in there! By day 5-6 my nipples were quite red and damaged, the LCs and midwives all thought (I was still in hosp) that I should pump for a day or two just to let them heal. I was worried about nipple confusion but they said its not anywhere near as common as its made out to be. I pumped for 24 hours, and she went straight back to the breast without issue. Also, I recommend hydrogel breast discs, very soothing!
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@Umberto: thankfully only ST urine incontinence, after a few weeks and some kegals things were better.
@agold: how are you doing today? Hoping your recovery is happening even if it's slow!
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A huge congratulations to the ladies who have recently welcomed their bubs!!
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