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@Ms. RV: L sleeps through (and falls asleep during) the dogs barking, and they are LOUD, sharp barks. But if I sneeze across the room her eyes pop open. Weirdo babies.
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@OhCaptain ohh good to know. I need to get the wonder weeks app. LO has been super grouchy, difficult to take naps, etc. the past few days so that makes sense. I FINALLY got him down for a nap about 40 mins ago and he's still asleep so I feel like it's a huge victory. I feel like I am spending my whole day rocking him, doing ANYTHING I can think of to get him to sleep because not sleeping makes it even worse!!
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Just caught up...this was my first week back at work!!
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@Mrs. J: how'd it go?? Is the second time any easier?
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@abmamma: we survived, but it was still crazy. I wasn't ready mentally at all. Also I had to jump right in because the school year already started.
To top things off, L slid out of the nanny's arms when she tried to pick up J (they were both crying), so on Friday both DH and I rushed home early. Thankfully, he's totally fine. She was more of a wreck than anyone.
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You guys, my 8 wk old takes literally hours of rocking to fall asleep at naps and at night. It's git ten dramatically worse in the last week. Is this a developmental thing that will improve? I am literally about to lose my mind. My whole body hurts from spending hours every day rocking an 11 lb baby. Sometimes he just doesn't nap because I am too exhausted or my knees hurt too much to rock for 90 minutes plus. And then it's even harder to get him to go to sleep. I am really having a tough time with this. Someone please tell me it gets better.
Putting him down drowsy but awake doesn't work. And he won't sleep on me unless I'm rocking and moving which is not sustainable. He will sleep on his own but he has to be super deep asleep, and even after a looooong time of rocking, he immediately wakes up about 80 percent of the time when I put him down and I have to startry the whole process over again.
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@MrsADS: it will get better, but I can't promise you when.
my son napped on me until he was about 11 months old. And then he napped next to me (but at least I could get up to pee/eat/ throw in a load of laundry. By the time he dropped his nap (at 3.5) he was falling asleep by himself and staying asleep for 2.5 hours. It will get better.
I never could do drowsy but awake with him either, what a joke. Will your little guy nap in a swing or baby carrier? -
@Ohcaptain that's not what I want to hear, LOL! He won't nap in a swing. Baby carrier - sometimes but it's still pretty hot here (south Florida) and he tends to get super hot and cranky in a baby carrier. Maybe when it cools down a little.
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@MrsADS: you have my sympathies lady. it's gotta end at some point right? i mean he has mature and grow out of it I would think. even R's more minor issues - screaming bloody murder in the stroller for example, seem to be miraculously improving this week.
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@MrsADS: drowsy but awake doesn't really work for us either, maybe once every few days? And only for the first morning nap. But we are still waking every 2 hours or so at night and I just keep thinking longingly of a 4 hour stretch. I feel for you so much though because that amount of time actively rocking sounds majorly exhausting.
Hugs to you! -
@MrsADS: For what it's worth, both as a nanny and now as a mom, I've never had luck with drowsy but awake. I hope you're able to gigure (autocorrect is not doing its job!) something out soon!
Anyone know anything about lactating boob issues? I had what looked and felt like a pretty painful zit at the base of one nipple, with a pea sized knot under it. I messed with it a little, and it popped. A bit of white stuff (puss? old milk?) came out and it bled a teeny bit. Now it hurts but it seems like the knot is gone. I had a larger knot (large-ish marble size?) in the same spot a little while back, but it went away on its own. Not sure if there's anything I should be doing differently?
Also, those of you who pump, how consistent is your output? When I was pretty much just pumping, mine was very consistent- right around 1.25oz per hour, no matter how long I went between pumping. Now that she's nursing (with a tube to supplement at the breast) a lot more frequently, it's totally erratic. But it seems to have nothing to do with nursing. One side will suddenly produce three times as much as the other, even if she hasn't nursed that day, etc. It seems weird. I had stopped tracking my total output, because it was so exactly the same every day, but I think I'll track it tomorrow to see if the total amount has changed or just the proportions.
And lastly, because I always write too much, LO seems to think she's an irrational little toddler already. Her new thing is to adamantly reject milk, boob or bottle, multiple times, then out of nowhere start melting down wanting to be fed. Even though she acted like "wtf why would you put that in my mouth" 30 seconds before. Too young to be starting this mess, kid!
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Ugh- I had a whole long post and my phone ate it. Here's the shorter version:
@MrsADS: my dd was like this from 2 months until about 4 months when she finally learned to self-soothe. Granted we did start letting we fuss in the crib a bit (not CIO) when I went back to work since no child care provider was going to be able to do all the bouncing. In the mean time, a yoga ball really helps!!it does get better!
@Torchwood: it sounds like you had a milk blister/bleb. It's a plugged pore on your nipple that results in a clogged milk duct (the knot). Once you opened the bleb, the milk was able to flow and the knot went away. One way to prevent reoccurence is to exfoliate your nipple in the shower regularly!
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@Torchwood: my pump output is very small but fairly consistent, although I think it's increased lately yay! but I'm talking about the whole day's total not necessarily each individual session.
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Okay looking for advice here, not sympathy. What would you guys do...
LO was sleeping well through the night in the RnP. 6 hour stretch and then a 2 hour stretch. Nursing around 4am. Usually bed time is around 9:30. She had that one good night in the crib last week, and every night since then has sucked ass. Last night she slept in the crib 10-1. DH couldn't get her back down so I caved and nursed, then it took me forever to get her to sleep, finally moved her to the RnP. She slept 2-5. Up again, VERY fitful sleep for the next 2 hours. We were up a bagillion times trying to rock her back to sleep. I nursed again side lying hoping she would doze off and never did. She probably got a collective 20 mins sleep during that period. Every night has been some variation of this. I don't know what to do at this point. She seems to hate the swaddle when she wakes up but can't fall asleep without it. I tried a new swaddle that keeps her arms up for a hot minute last night and she woke up every time I put her down, so quickly abandoned that. My mom says I have to stick it out with the crib and can't go back at this point but that it's ok to move her to the RnP at some point in the night. I also want to try an earlier bedtime maybe? Like 7? What would you guys do?
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We survived Disneyworld!
P did great on the plane both ways, sleeping the whole 4 hours each time!
She slept in the hotel crib 2 of 3 nights
She loved fireworks, parades, It's a Small World, and Winnie the Pooh.
And best of all, she passed her Mspi trial! Cheese for me!
Fun weekend, but glad to be home
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@buttermilk: I'd probably try to stick it out in the crib a bit longer. It'll be a transition whenever you do it and it might be easier while you are still home (since you are going back to work in a few weeks, right?). That said, the transition could be easier when she's a little older. So hard to say. Parenting is such a game of trial and error!
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Thanks all for the thoughts/advice!! M is just generally fighting daytime sleep with a vengeance. I would just hold him if he would nap but that doesn't work. This morning he went down for about an hour (so from 7:45am to 11:45am he was awake for all but an hour!), and he JUST went down for another nap about 20 minutes ago... we'll see how long it lasts. That was after 2 hours of working on getting him to sleep. Nights are a little worse but it's the daytime that is so bad. I feel like I am going crazy, I am getting depressed. Like, it's 2pm and I'm wearing the same clothes from yesterday, haven't washed my face or brushed my hair, my house is a wreck... because I have been rocking Mr. Overtired alllll day. I HOPE this is some sort of developmental thing and it will get better.
@buttermilk ugh hugs lady that sounds horrible! M is I think one week behind R (he was 8wks on 10/24) and we are FIRMLY still in the RnP/full swaddle camp! I know we are going to have to move to the crib and out of the swaddle sooner rather than later, but I mean... these are still really little babies, you know? I voiced my concerns to our pediatrician at M's 2 month checkup and she was like, eh, they are too young at this point to make any negative sleep associations, just do what you have to do to get them to sleep. I guess whether you buy that or not is a different story, but it gave me some peace of mind. At this rate I am going to have a 6 month old I have to rock for 2 hours who is swaddled and sleeping in the RnP!! Could you maybe do crib for naps and RnP at night? A more gradual transition? If I was getting that good of sleep in the RnP I'd probably keep her there a little longer, but at this point I am willing to do anything for some more sleep.
Re: the swaddle, M hates it going in and when he wakes up, but I KNOW he would not be sleeping nearly as much if he was unswaddled (his arms still flail around a lot, he would wake himself up). He wriggles like a fish in a bag when he wakes up in the swaddle and he is MAD, but it is what it is. I just undo the velcro to let his arms out and he chills out (although will not go back to sleep like that).
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@MrsADS: Geeez! R also fought daytime sleep during her 2nd wonder week so maybe it's the same for your babe! She is 10 weeks now. Also samesies with the swaddle. I just tried her second nap in the crib - uhhhh NO. She was not having it. I tried to leave an arm out, would love for her to learn to self soothe. But any time she finds her hand she just gets PISSED that it's not my nipple. That and she just flails it around like she is conducting a damn orchestra. Wakes herself up. So in her arm went again. Still wouldn't stay asleep so I caved and put her in the swing. I think I'm gonna have a swaddled, swinging six year old one day.
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@MrsADS: @buttermilk: P is hard to put down for naps too! DH says she's on the EAFSY system, where F is for fuss! Seriously, crying hysterically for 30 min, then boom, asleep. She doesn't do it at night though, maybe because we swaddle? I rarely do a nap swaddle. I usually hold her, unless she naps in the swing. I think we plan to nap train in December when she is 4 months old and in the PnP exclusively.
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@buttermilk: re "swaddled, swinging six year old"- LOL. I had the same thought with DD but good news is she's 3 now and sleeps by herself in a full size bed
. We used the swing for some naps with her until close to 4 months. And I kept that swaddle on for a LONG time since she slept like crap without it. To the point my parents made jokes about her going to college with it. But she was slow to roll over and slept better with it so I did not care. And one day I went to get her up for the day and she had busted out of the swaddle but managed to put herself asleep and we switched to sleep sacks. It will happen - just give it time!
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F it, maybe I should move the swing to her room and do nighttime in it too. She sleeps SO well in the swing in the daytime even after I turn it off, which is currently in our living room. I've been reading the troublesome tots site when I should have been napping myself, and she says the swing can rly teach babies how to sleep on their own and that you should put it in the nursery and then gradually lower the speed and wean off of the motion and then finally move them to the crib instead.
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@buttermilk: here's what I would do: whatever results in the most amount of sleep, for the most amount of people. For me that means doing 100% of night time parenting for the infant (DH deals with any of my 3yo wake ups). I nurse her back to sleep everytime. BUT I'm firmly in the camp that believes infants need to nurse at night and that kids reach developmental milestones in their own time, and that sleep is a milestone, just so you know where I'm coming from.
With my son, I ended up co-sleeping with him after his first wake up because I for the life of me could not get him back into his crib without him waking up. He grew out of it. It will all get better, I promise -
@buttermilk: I agree with @OhCaptain, do what works! You all need sleep.
The swing idea sounds good to me. I wish L would sleep in the swing. I don't mind holding her for naps most of the time, but it gets old. Though I'm thinking about trying putting her in our bed. She does so well at night, even when I put her down and go do some things (put away milk, brush teeth, etc) before I come lay down with her.Off-topic, anyone have any ideas for fleas on the dogs? We've tried frontline (which normally works great), baths, professional flea baths, nothing helps. They are just covered, and I feel so bad!
@abmamma: Thank you, I'll try that! It hurt, so I do not want it to happen again!
@Mrs. Microscope: Yay! I'm jealous. I love Disney, but DH doesn't like it. He worked at a baseball camp in FL as a teenager, and they took the kids, so he went multiple times per summer for years. Thankfully he is looking forward to taking L (and doing some fun stuff like the princess salon if she's into that), so I'll be going in a few years!
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I've been reading through all your posts but haven't gotten around to typing lately.
Had Isla's 12 week/3 month check up today (3 months old already?!
) and she is now 13lbs 4oz! She has more vaccinations next week that I'm not looking forward to.Do whatever it takes to get both yourself and baby to sleep - I nursed LO1 to sleep for both daytime and nighttime sleep until she stopped at 9 months old. Isla is a bit different though, I can nurse her to sleep during the day but not before bed at night - she prefers to be awake when I put her in her crib.
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Arg. A perfectly nice conversation with dh turned into me getting mad and him getting upset because of sex. I have ZERO interest right now, probably a combination of being tired and hormones. He's not thrilled about that, unsurprisingly. I don't know what to do. The one time we've DTD since LO was born was just crappy, and not because of postpartum issues from having a small tear. It's just that forcing it out of pity/guilt doesn't make for a fun time. He doesn't want that, obviously, but if the drive is not there I don't know how to create it- I can't just snap my fingers and have a high libido at will. Add to that the logistical issues (the only time we really could make it work is after LO goes down for the night, cutting into my already limited sleep), and I don't know the solution. I feel like I'm being selfish by not making more of an effort, but the desire is just not there, and I don't know how to create it (I've tried!).
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@Torchwood: I think lots of women have low drive while breastfeeding due to hormones. Mine is low as well, not gone, but not high for sure.
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@buttermilk for what it's worth, M's GI doctor strongly encourages sleeping in the swing! If M would sleep in the swing I wold do it!
Non baby related comment/question. So I have noticed that in the morning, my belly is kind of back to pre pregnant flatness (well, so not exactly flat, plus some extra rolls of baby weight, but you know). But by bedtime, I have a little pregnant looking pot belly! It is so weird! Anyone else have this?
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@Torchwood: I'm with you. I have absolutely zero sex drive right now, and it was SO high throughout my pregnancy, even at the end. Luckily DH says he understands. I mean between the hormones, exhaustion, feeling like a milk machine, being covered in spit up, and still 20 pounds heavier, how can he not understand? I'm sure I could make it happen if given the opportunity - set the mood, light candles, um brush my hair... But I just don't see that happening anytime soon with a newborn. Have you explained all of that to him?
We moved the swing to the Nursery and I'm currently nursing to sleep so fingers crossed.
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@MrsADS: yay! God I hope she sleeps tonight!!! And idk about the belly. Mine went down pretty quick but I have a lot of smush all over still :(. BFing is sooooo not helping me drop weight
Thank you to everyone for the sleep advice today!
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@buttermilk yea I definitely have the smush. Still 13 lbs over prepregnancy weight and the only reason I'm that close is the elimination diet...
Sooo you guys talking about sex are making me feel a little guilty because we have not yet had sex PP!
anyone else?? I'm scared bc it's still pretty tender down there honestly, especially around my episiotomy scar. This is major TMI but sometimes it still feels like it might split open when I poop. So the thought of sex is like... no way. I'm gonna do a few more weeks of the pelvic floot therapy and maybe that will help but I am scared!!! Thankfully DH is super understanding and not giving me any pressure.
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@MrsADS: I would say mine is like that. I'm down to pre-pregnancy weight (100% luck- it was the same with R), but my belly sometimes doesn't look nearly as flat as other times. Also, with your episiotomy issues and having such a difficult baby, I wouldn't expect you to be thinking about sex! Part of my problem is that I had only a minor tear, L is super easy (minus wanting to be held most of the time), and she was early so it's been a lot longer for us than for most of y'all. I wasn't feeling it towards the end either, so it's really been longer. (Though I feel like that's a good thing, because what if sex had put me in labor even sooner?!)
@buttermilk: He kind of gets that, but I think he thought it'd be better by now. And he's gained weight in the last couple years (he's a stress eater), so he worries that I don't find him attractive. It doesn't bother me, I don't even like skinny guys, but it would help if I could "prove" it. I dunno. He's not snotty about it or anything; it only came up tonight because he's going to Vegas in November and he joked about going to a bordello. That was fine, I don't mind if he jokes about it, but he kept pushing on it too much. Dude, I know you want to get laid, I can even handle one joke, even two. But lay off.
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@MrsADS: yeah definitely don't feel guilty, we haven't either! And I get the same feeling when I poop - like I'm gonna poop my vagina out.
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@MrsADS: Nope, totally haven't done it yet over here, either (and I'm 12 weeks pp). I just have zero interest right now. With LO1, the first time we DTD was a couple days before he turned 4 months. Sex drive increased a bit around 6 months, but didn't come back completely until after I weaned (and I was already pregnant again!).
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Just when you think you have things figured out! L refused a good nap all afternoon, for both me and DH. We both cuddle her close. She has however, fallen asleep twice this evening laying across our laps all sprawled out, which she never does. Kinda nice to have my hands free, I guess. And maybe it means she'll sleep without being held soon!
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@MrsADS: my belly wasn't flat pre-preg and im 20 pounds below that weight now, but my belly is definitely smaller in the morning. I attributed it to c-section stuff, but maybe it's just pregnancy in general.
As for sex, we have but only like....5 times. I don't think my libido has ever been the same since my first, but I think that has a lot to do with sleep deprivation. -
Saw this today. I feel like even those of us who don't have older LO's can relate.
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Oh, and for those of you with girls- these socks arrived today, and we've already ordered 4 more pairs. They actually stay on! She wore them about 9 hours, and they never moved a millimeter. Plus they're cute! I'm in love.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B013J8QA1W/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_0bWlwb7YCJFFM -
@Torchwood: Ahhh, that is so true!! And it gets better and better! My toddler turns 2 in a few weeks and I have those "but I love you so much!" moments all the time, even though he drives me crazy!!
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@Torchwood: oh thanks for the tip, I'm always on the hunt for socks that actually stay on! That comic is hilarious and just how I feel after a horrible night and then can't stop smiling at me first thing in the morning.
Well seriously FML. Every single night has been worse than the last. She has already been up 3 times from 9:30-1am and the swing is not helping clearly. I brought her downstairs just now and she will not settle!! I am nursing again. I think it's clear she is SO not ready for the nursery right now? I think I'm abandoning ship. The day before I started moving her she slept 10 hours straight. I just hope things can get back to normal. And of course DH and I just had a fight bc he "asked me not to wake him up tonight" and is skeeping on the couch now. I really tried but I feel like I'm going crazy!
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What have I done? Have I ruined her sleep forever by trying to move her? Even after putting her back in the room with us last night - she slept 1.5 hours, 1.75 hours, 2 hours & then 1 hour.
my son napped on me until he was about 11 months old. And then he napped next to me (but at least I could get up to pee/eat/ throw in a load of laundry. By the time he dropped his nap (at 3.5) he was falling asleep by himself and staying asleep for 2.5 hours. It will get better.
) and she is now 13lbs 4oz! She has more vaccinations next week that I'm not looking forward to.
anyone else?? I'm scared bc it's still pretty tender down there honestly, especially around my episiotomy scar. This is major TMI but sometimes it still feels like it might split open when I poop. So the thought of sex is like... no way. I'm gonna do a few more weeks of the pelvic floot therapy and maybe that will help but I am scared!!! Thankfully DH is super understanding and not giving me any pressure.
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