Hellobee Boards

@dc yoga bee: Ugh, that would drive me NUTS!! I'm actually worried about my parents coming post-baby. I don't know if they will but they tend to act more like guests than making themselves at home.

We had to plan the baby shower around THEIR schedule, and even if I didn't have a coffeemaker- there is hot coffee and all sorts of syrups and creamers FOR FREE in our building. Delivered daily from the local coffee shop. And their is a cafe in our building if I didn't have groceries (but I always stock up.) it was just foul all around! MIL also asked DH if she could attend the birth. Last I checked, I was the one giving birth, and no you can't be in the room lady!! They are definitely getting a hotel after baby is born. We are in a 2 bedroom place!

I'm up in the air about families visiting and need to address it pre-June so I don't stress out...

Basically, MIL and FIL will be coming out for a week once DH goes back to work. When this happens also depends on when SIL has her baby. Unless I happen to be really early (but that might not change things). Basically, MIL is going to help SIL (her daughter) for a week or two post-baby and then will come out here and do the same for me. I don't mind MIL/FIL because they definitely make themselves at home and don't get in my/our hair. MIL also runs a daycare at home so she's fine with babies. They will grab extra groceries if we run out or don't have them, will find whatever in the kitchen and cook, do dishes, etc. So I don't really mind them visiting.

My parents are another story... They have two houses - one 3 1/2 hours away and the other 6-8 hours away (depending on traffic). The closer home is currently for sale. They were just in discussions for a sale to close the end of May that didn't work out. At this point, I'm going to suggest they close mid-July, depending on when they get an offer. I don't know the last time they've driven 6-8 hours and that will keep them staying down here long than if it was a shorter drive. But I really need to talk to them because I don't know if they plan on coming when I'm in labor, right after, etc. They tend to act more like guests and I need to make it clear that I will not be blowing up any air beds, helping in the kitchen, etc. The kitchen is small, nothing is hidden in there, trust me, so just look and find it! I don't feel right saying don't visit and I don't know how I feel about having them stay somewhere else if I'm letting MIL/FIL stay with us. So I'm trying to think of all sorts of options to make the situation do-able. If they want to come down right away, I think I'm going to limit staying with us post-hospital to one night. They can stay there while I'm at the hospital and come visit, but DH only has a week home and we want as much of that to be the two of us.

Sorry for all the verbal diarrhea! Anyone with LO#2 coming that has suggestions??

@Jess1483: Wow, everything you described is how my inlaws behaved. They would camp out at our condo for 8-10 hours a day while I was trying to manage a newborn. We didn't have the space, so they stayed in a hotel which was a whole boatload of drama. My MIL was literally crying about it. She saw our daybed and wanted to stay in LO's room. Such a mess. She later stayed in the nursery and put her clothes on his crib, was generally awful, etc. It was total and utter hell. She wanted a vacation, not to help. I did laundry and dishes when she was there and when his family was there.

There's talk about them talking LO off our hands for a short time nearby, but I'm tabling that conversation for a long time. Basically, my MIL stirs up trouble and drama whenever she's around. She's the main reason why we did marriage counseling for most of LO's first year.

My parents have cleared their month of June for us. They'll take LO for awhile like a week to hang out with his cousins and them as we adjust with a newborn/infant as well as hopefully moving at that time too.

ETA: We don't have the daybed anymore, so we've cut off MIL's chances of staying with us in the name of getting ready to sell and getting rid of old stuff.

I have SO much to say on the topic of parents/in-laws and the delivery room.

First of all, my mom is notorious for not being supportive of things that are different than what she thinks they should be or things that are different from what SHE did. She also doesn't respect boundaries. I have been telling her for over a year that whenever I have the baby, she will NOT be in the room at all because she hasn't shown me any support for wanting to do natural, unmdicated childbirth. As a matter of fact, the first line in my birth plan is that under no circumstance should she be allowed on the delivery room because I know she'll try.

She is also VERY insistent that her and dad need to be here before the birth which I've told her I'm not okay with, but if she must that they have to stay in a hotel until I tell her we are ready for them to stay with us post baby being born. This has been a huge controversy since we have a 3 bedroom house, but every time she brings it up I tell her it's non-negotiable.

I also worry about her being around after the birth even though I know she feels like some inner pull to do it because "I'm her baby". She didn't breastfeed and I'm worried she's going to be awful. She told my SIL every single time that she nursed that she should just pump so everyone else could feed my nephew. So, I sent her this article recently: http://homecomingdoula.com/2015/02/how-to-love-mom-two-words/

I don't know how long she's planning on staying, but I have a feeling if she isn't helpful that DH will ask them to leave.

My ILs are amazing. Ha!! Super supportive and helpful. We are planning on calling them in early labor, so they can make the drive up. They'll just stay a day or two to meet her and then my MIL will fly back up after Mom leaves. DH and I are actually looking forward to her being around to help.

So, that's my situation. I'm glad I've laid everything out for mom already because it's been 6 months and she's still fighting it and gets hurt feelings over it. But, this time is about me, DH and LO and I'm not going to spend my energy worrying about her.

I feel so extremely lucky. We have both sets of parents close to us in the same town. And both I'm sure will be amazing, my MIL is the most giving and selfless person. She will drop everything to try and help out. My mom I think will act more like a guest though and not help me out as much with stuff. But no where near where I wouldn't want her to be there!

34 week picture!! Yay

Anyone else super busy with first world problems before their showers lol!?! I had to get my nails done, my eyebrows waxed (haven't had them waxed since December ), then I needed to go to the mall to get hostesses gifts fmro the shower, and then to target for misc. items. It's now 5:00 somewhere, and MIL and SIL will be here in 3 hours. Oh yay. So, now I need to finish tidying up our place. First world problems!!

@MamaB: aww, he should be able to get out of it! I was able to get out of jury duty because it fell in my sister's due date.

@LindsayInNY: This is what I ended up doing with a little bag of coffee from a local shop.

http://m.anthropologie.com/anthro/m/catalog/productdetail.jsp?id=073732#/

@MamaB: You sound exactly like me the other night! I even had oatmeal too! 3:00 is a popular time. I'm ready for company from my shower to leave so I can nap!

@Eko: Looking good!

@Eko: You look great! I'm so jealous of your FL vacay! I'm also a registry stalker- ha!

@MamaB: Good news!

I had an appointment this morning too (32 weeks) and my doctor told me that she is moving at the end of June! She should still be here for my due date but if I go over a few days late she might be gone. And even though I know there was no guarantee that she would have been the one to deliver me it still stresses me out! And then we walked over for the 4D and the baby was sound asleep with her hands over her face. We got a good shot of her hands and she has hair but that's all we could see! We are going to try again in a few days but I feel bad because my MIL stayed in town an extra day to come with us. Oh well - it's a real first world problem to have!

@MamaB: At least ya'll are still trying! Poor DH - I haven't even attempted it in weeks

@MamaB: I definitely at times feel awkward, which is probably why we've cut back on frequency. There are some definite positions we avoid too.

@MamaB: sex? What's that!?! After I threw up during the act at 18 weeks, DH knows not even to come near me!

@dc yoga bee: yeah, nothing going on in our bedroom either We've both been too tired and now with the prolapse issue, we're both been afraid to try.

@MamaB: since I was on pelvic rest between weeks 20-28 for the low lying placenta. And we were given the go ahead after 28 weeks, we've only had sex twice. I feel bad, but idk both of us just do t seem that into it. I'm going to try and start some things in the next few weeks because I feel bad! But nothing much is happening in this house

@MamaB: We're still going strong but that's because it took us forever to DTD postpartum. We hope not to go down that road again but I don't want to miss any opportunities now.

Hi ladies! I haven't been on in a while since my company decided to block HB. Apparently the block doesn't work when you work from home so I had to pop on and say hey! We are all getting so close! I have an app on my phone that let me know I have 35 days till my due date. Guess I should think about getting things ready, huh?! I hope everyone is feeling okay. I'm definitely getting uncomfortable and am starting to feel like I am running out of space!