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I'm in breastfeeding hell right now.
So we went back to the LC yesterday. If we had thrush before, it seems to be gone now. The pain I'm having is because my nipple isn't going far enough back in her mouth and is hitting her hard palate. To add to that, she has a bubble/high-arched palate, and she gags at anything that does go back as far as her soft palate, including my nipple, fingers, and soothers.
We're supposed to nurse football-style, suck train her, and use a shield for me to heal. All well and good at the LC's office but as soon as I'm on my own I CAN'T get her to latch deeply in football hold. I don't even think I'm holding her right, and she's just bouncing off of the shield, then sucking on just the nipple (except it's harder to see/keep her on because of the shield). She's constantly hungry now and if I take her off to readjust, she screams. She screams while I get the shield on. She screams while I pile sixteen pillows up so I can hold her in awkward, uncomfortable football.
My first session this morning, I ended up giving up and ditching the shield, and of course, she compressed my nipple in football. So I gave up even more, put the shield back on and nursed her in our terrible cradle style, because at least that made her satisfied enough to fall asleep.
I'm supposed to go back for a pump if things don't improve by Thursday. At this point I just want to friggin' give up, but I don't. She's eating and gaining, still. It's just so effing hard.
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I'm catching up on the rest of the board but wanted to post our 2 month photo
It would be a better comparison if they were all in the same location but she couldn't sit up for long before so the glider was out!
It's hard to believe how much she's changed in little ways and how different she looks from her newborn picture
**Edited to Add**
She's up to 9lbs 14oz and 21 inches which isn't too bad at all (up 3lbs 6oz and 3 inches from birth)
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@ mrs. pink -so cute! I love her hair in the 2 month photo.
It's crazy how much they change in such a short time. I was looking at some photos of our LO yesterday and thinking the same.
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@mrsdragon - I'm so sorry that it's so hard for you. I hope the LC appt tomorrow is better.
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@Ash: We are using avent naturals glass and she's had no issues with nipple confusion or gas. We also have born free glass but haven't used them since it's going well with the avent.
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@sweetooth: yes the shield is definitely allowing my nipple to heal but DD is never able to empty my breast with it.
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@MrsDragon: I'm so sorry you're going through that with BF. Using a shield is hard work. DD always gets frustrated while I fumble to get the damn thing on. It will get easier!
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@MrsDragon: Dude, I am so sorry.
I hope you're able to get some answers when you're back today! Football hold and shields blow, especially with a screaming baby! Thinking of you!@Mrs. Pink: Too cute!!! I love the hair (my LO has looots of hair, too and that's all people seem to comment on!)!
So far tonight has gone way better, we had a 3.5 hour sleep stretch to start, fed and rocked, then a n most 4.5 stretch (ok, there was about a half hour where I kept giving her the pacifier because she had only been down for 2 hours and I knew she wasn't hungry...luckily she eventually fell back asleep)! Here's hoping we're finally on the upswing of being back in the RnP! I'll tackle the crib...later.
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@MrsDragon: I'm sorry you guys have having such a hard time of it-- I hated the football hold and using a shield was hard for me as well-- I wonder if trying a different shield or size shield would help?? I'm no expert esp. since the breastfeeding just didn't happen for us- but I didn't know they had different sizes and shapes (different brands make them like bottles I guess) but maybe she'll like one of the other styles better?
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@Mrs. J: Every two hours must be exhausting! I'm glad you have some time in the sun to balance out the crazy schedule. And that adorable smile of his to look at
Hope Jack stretches it out to three hour gaps soon and continues to give you longer gaps at night.@ms.janedoe: I think it's great that you can be a SAHM. Sometimes I wish I could, at least for his first year.
@ChitownRo: your nanny sounds fantastic! Congrats! You've convinced me to give care.com a closer look. Also, Ollie is such a little stud already
cute picture!@stine_ciro: congrats on your SAHM status! And yes, if you suspect the beginnings of something painful in your nips while feeding, I recommend being proactive. There's always the initial sting in feeding for me, but I definitely was in more pain than bliss during feedings. Keep an eye on your little one's mouth.
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@ms.janedoe: I gave up on having ours even sleep in her cradle and am dreading trying the crib once hubby gets it made (I finally found building plans we like!)
right now she sleeps in the bed on "daddy's old side" -- thankfully she doesn't know how to roll from back to tummy yet so we're safe with two rolled up receiving blankets on either side of her-- this is the only way that I can get a decent night out of her- I don't want to jinx it again but last night and the night before she fell asleep by 10:30 and didn't wake up until 3 to eat the first time-- she'll stay awake for about an hour or two and then go back to sleep until 8:30- it's not a straight stretch but for now, I'll take it LOL
Daddy sleeps on the tiny twin bed we have in the guest room.... which he's "ok" with as long as he gets uninterrupted sleep!
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@MrsDragon: I'm so sorry to hear about your breast feeding pains and problems. You're doing a great job and it's so good that you are seeing an LC. Breast feeding is really effing hard. I'm doing my best to keep on plugging along too. Big hugs to you!
@Mrs. Pink: she is sooooo cute!
@ms.janedoe: yay for a good night!
I'm headed back to see an LC today. My ped was concerned that he hasn't gained enough between his 1 and 2 month appt. nothing like adding that complex to a mom who's battling thrush. Last night we had the sweetest feeding yet though. He cooed when I picked him up, he fed well and didn't end the session screaming. This morning... Back to the screams. Looking forward to my LC appt. even if it's a TON of work to get him out the door.
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Thanks everyone. I really want to throw in the towel but something in me is stubborn. It doesn't feel like it's getting any easier and I'm super engorged over the last two days and paranoid that she isn't eating enough because it takes us an hour to get her lached and then she falls asleep.
it feels like we're getting all the newborn breast feeding drama two months too late!
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After being on an elimination diet for nearly 4 weeks and then being on a complete TED for the last 2+ weeks (I'm eating the same lovely 3 foods) we are finally seeing some major improvements! She is back to being the sweet newborn that sleeps and rarely makes a sound that we brought home from the hospital. It makes me nervous to be adding foods back in..I really enjoy this side of her
Now that the chronic diarrhea has calmed down we have switched back over to cloth. I have a super heavy wetter on my hands!! I'm not sure how to deal with it! Every single diaper change at night has resulted in a completely soaked bed! She can soak a CD to leaking within 15 min too
Needless to say we picked up some more sposies for nighttime use until I figure out which diaper or combination of inserts work for her overnight. No one has time to change the sheets 5x a night.She is back to nursing shorter periods (7-15, but usually around 7) of time and the falling asleep. We have her 2 month appointment on Wednesday, so I'm anxious to see if she is still gaining well and is still just an efficient nurser. I'm guessing she is going to be somewhere in the 12lb range.
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@anbanan15: Good luck with your diet! Curious to see if she's still gaining well, my LO is only on the boob for 5-10 minutes at a feeding so I'm hoping she's just fast!
@MrsDragon: How's it going today? Any better?
@sweetooth: How was the appointment?
@Mrs. Pink: Dude, that's awesome sleep! Jealous!
Last night didn't go as well, 3 hour stretch followed by a 2.5 hour stretch, then we were kind if downhill from there and I pulled her into bed with me around 3:30. Yawn. We had a rough morning with a huge spit up, but then took an hour nap in bed, so that was good! I feel like I should be so serious about "crib naps" and "drowsy but awake" and stuff, but when it comes down to it, all I want to do is cuddle her! Plus, it's so easy!
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@anbanan15: Glad to hear the elimination diet worked so well for you. And that your baby is so happy and peaceful
Take it easy as you add things back in. My ped suggested I eliminate dairy from my diet, but I just cant handle that right now. First I handle this thrush and now supplementation - then I might consider one more thing.And I hear you on those soakers. I keep changing my guy after feeds, then I put him down, he starts to wail, and I see the dark spot growing behind him. His diaper is dry, but I think he sucks in his waist and the pee leaks out. So we just change outfits and he's fine. He does NOT like to be wet. I've been told to "tuck it down" for him, but he wiggles so much that I don't think my tucks even stay down.
@ms.janedoe: Cuddle away
My appointment went ok. Turns out my little one is not getting enough from me at our feeds. The weigh in feeding showed that he gets just under 2oz from my breasts. So we jumped into formula right then and there. I was a little overwhelmed, but I figured having her help me jump in was better than attempting it on my own at home for the first time. So now after each breastfeeding he gets a 1oz formula chaser. Even up to 2oz if he takes it.It's hard because it introduces a whole new set of variables, but I still can't think of pumping when my breasts are healing and I'm on these meds to get better. I need to get better before I even think about that.
Did you take fenugreek? Do you still?
@MrsDragon: Does your LC do the weight thing before and after you feed at your appointment? I think it's the best way to know if your little girl is getting enough. Hope your appointment went well and you're hanging in there.
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I also wanted to add that we are using the Comotomo bottles (which is what we originally intended to use, but I needed 8 oz Medela's for pumping so we just decided to get the Calma kit and try that..fail). She does take the Comotomo better than the Calma, but overall she hates anything in her mouth that isn't nipple. She will only take about 2-3 oz from the bottle at a time and my mom said she really has to work with her to do that. DH will be watching her this Tuesday from ~6a-4p and I'm not sure he will have the patients to fuss with her. He may need to bring her into me at lunch to nurse.
@ms.janedoe: I'll let you know. She was there at 1.5 months and was still gaining well then, so I'm assuming so. Do you find your LO nurses for longer stretches in the evening/overnight? She tends to do this. She has also been going longer stretches between nuring, but still is only at the boob a small amount of time overall.
@sweetooth: Yes! She hates the slightest wetness too. DS was the same way, however, he was not a super soaker like she is. This is so new. Oh and we never "tucked it down" with DS and we didn't have leaks, although I have had people mention that you need to do that with little boys.
I hope the thrush clears up soon. Eliminating dairy is not too bad once you get started. It just seems so intimidating at first. I wonder if you were to eliminate dairy now if it would help clear up your bout of thrush?! If you do decide to, this is a great shopping guide to take with you to ensure your getting all the obvious and hidden sources of dairy out of your diet: http://www.foodallergy.org/document.doc?id=133
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@anbanan15: Thank you so much for this helpful document! I'm not against trying to eliminate dairy. But yes, it is overwhelming when I'm already embracing so much change this week. I was looking for the threads that you mentioned starting about specific diets and your experience. Have you started them? (I will admit I didn't know where to look on the boards...)
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@sweetooth: No I didn't start it yet, but I will try to I that soon. It would be on the allergies/sensitivities board: http://boards.hellobee.com/board/allergies-sensitivities.
ETA: I think that document is excellent for our SO's to carry lol My DH hates shopping for me because he says it takes too long to read all the labels.
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@anbanan15: Yeah, our last feed before bed is usually ways long, as are her overnight ones...which confuses me. I don't know if she gets distracted during the day, she just comfort nurses at night, or what. Confused.
I am going to make a weight check appointment before the 4 month one to see how she's doing. Her diaper counts still seem fine, so who knows. Comotomo are the bottles we use, too!How long are your LOs awake periods?
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@ms.janedoe: Sounds like are lo's are very similar! She is such a super soaker but I don't know where it all comes from with these short feeds! Her outputs are still on target so who knows. I had the same thought about distractions durin the day etc.
According to the highly accurate weigh and subtract method she is 12.5 lbs (clothed, dry diaper) which would be up 1.5 lbs from 1/7.
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@sweetooth: I started eliminating dairy on Wednesday and even though dairy is in everything (Ugh!) it's not been too bad. There are a ton of resources online that have helped. But I'm just wondering why they want you to eliminate if you're giving milk based formula?
@anbanan15: I wouldn't want to add foods back in either!
@ms.janedoe: pumping has helped me put ds down after he eats otherwise I wouldn't get anything done and he wouldn't have his next meal lol!
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@Ash: I guess the idea to eliminate dairy was brought up on Monday at his 2 month check up. But yesterday's appt was a different doctor and we just kind of launched into formula. He still gets breast milk so if I eliminated it could still help with the gas, right? Or pointless if he's taking in formula with dairy?
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@sweetooth: my guess would that it'd be pointless unless you did ailimentum or nutramigen... but that's just a guess, like I said. We're having the same problems with gas so I'm going to see if this helps and if it does I'd like to have something hypoallergenic on hand just in case.
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@sweetooth: I'm with @Ash: on that one. I don't think it would be effective unless all sources of dairy, including te formula, were removed. I must have missed the post about the formula. Hope you figure it out.
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So we went to the doctor Thursday for a checkup and he determined it's likely just irritation to my nipples, not thrush. We were doing ok so I opted to wait to see the LC until Monday. Friday morning was awwwfullll and so Mr. D called a public health nurse to come over. Of course the baby latched well while she was there, so she reccomended we ditch football because it was driving me nuts and just work on latching her in our preferred position (cradle).
It's been on and off miserable. We can get her latched really rarely but a lot of the time we're pulling her on and off until she's miserable and falls asleep or I just deal with a horrid latch. She shuts her mouth as she's coming onto me or she skips forward with her jaw. We're going back on Monday but I'm at a total loss.
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@MrsDragon: Are you open to supplementing? Or pumping instead of breast feeding? I know we aren't experiencing the exact same problems, but since I started supplementing both baby and I are happier. Take good care of yourself and I hope you're not in too much pain.
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@MrsDragon: like @sweetooth: said, we are much happier now that I pump and feed. You have to do what's best for you and dd.
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@MrsDragon: Thinking of you, lady! Agree with @sweetooth: and @Ash: , you've gotta do what's best for both of you!! Keep us updated!
We had a surprisingly good night's sleep last night--a 5 hour stretch for her and 4.5 for me (by the time I rocked her and got to bed), up to feed, then another 3 hour stretch for her (less for me because I couldn't fall asleep, STUPID!)! She always has this period in the morning between 4:30 and 6:30 where she just wants to be WIDE awake and kick/talk/giggle at evvverything, so we sat around for an hour while she did that, then went back to sleep (!) for another hour and a half-ish. Hoping it wasn't a one-time thing, it's been exactly a week since I started trying to get her back into her RnP, and I guess each night has been kind of getting better, so we'll see what tonight brings!
Got bad news from DH...he left on Thursday and was supposed to be home Monday-Wednesday, but his job isn't going well so he might not be back and have to go straight to the next one...until Friday the 31st. Over 2 weeks of flying solo...
It's all been going fine though, the only thing I kind of struggle with is eating. Hahah, it's difficult, especially at dinner time when she's having her fusssssy time to make and eat something!
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@ms.janedoe: glad to hear that sleep was good last night. I hope it continues for you! Sorry to hear about the extended solo time. You're a rockstar! And as for eating, smoothies, sandwiches and soups are relatively easy to prepare while wearing baby. I'm also a fan of making an egg sandwich for breakfast. Take good care of you!
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We had four hours of struggling to feed her this morning with little luck -- Mr. D is off to get a manual pump right now to get us through to tomorrow when we can hopefully get a hospital loaner. I don't want to go to exclusive pumping but I know it's a possibility -- hoping to pump to heal and get an emotional break and work on her latch when she's not starving and miserable and pissed off at us. I really hope the pump works! If we do end up going to exclusive pumping I have the pump part of a Pump In Style and just need to get the tubes and stuff (I know it's not hygienic or whatever but it came from my sister who barely used it).
I really feel like there must me some kind of anatomical problem because we've tried every latch trick we can find. Her lower jaw is just SO tight. I'm going to ask about silent reflux at the LCs tomorrow, too, because that's what my niece had and she kept going back to a shallow latch until they got it fixed. M always has sour milk breath, spits up a lot and wants to eat frequently, and she's projectile vomited a few times, but it doesn't seem to bug her, so I doubt that's the problem, but I'm willing to try anything at this point.
Thank you ladies for letting me continually vent about my boobs. I swear this is harder than labour.
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Dying. LO went down for 3 hours, an hour feed/rock, an hour and a half, then was fussing for an hour and a half in the RnP, finally gave in and fed/rocked for an hour, she went dobe for THIRTY MINUTES at 5:00 and we've been up since then. Efffff. I don't know what to do, she's swaddled, in the RnP, white noise, humidifier, dark cool room, blaaaaah. We're laying in bed and she's staring at the light on my phone. I gave up.
She's got to be exhausted, she's supposed to get what, 10 hours of sleep at night? Ha. I'm thinking her crappy daytime naps and super late nap are the culprits but don't know how to fix it, I tried evvvverything to get a good nap out of her yesterday and nothing worked. Tired.
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@ms.janedoe: we don't normally get naps out of ds during the day (unless it's a few crazy cat naps). But he sleeps great at night. 4-5hr stretches. Babies this age are supposed to sleep 14-16hrs I think I read. So maybe encourage her to stay awake during the day. Idk buy little Harper needs to let mommy get some rest.
no wonder week or growth spurt nearby?Oh and p.s. Boooooo to dh being gone. I couldn't do it. You're one awesome woman!
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@Ash: Haaahhha, were a few days away from the 3rd leap still (and a week from the 3 month growth spurt), so I think this one is just shitty sleep. Boo, I love having something to blame it on!! I'm pretty convinced her super early bedtime/super late nap are the culprits; her great night 2 nights ago was after an hour if screaming and an hour if being up later... I'm gonna try to keep her up after her 5:00-6:00ish nap and see what happens (and hope it doesn't lead to a meltdown...). It can't get much worse!
I thought my mom was coming for the day today and instead she'll only be here for an hour or two...lame!
Oh, here's the tough part, I have to deal with this at the wake ups:
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@MrsDragon: How's it going for you? Any better?? Thinking of you (and your poor boobs!)!
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@ms.janedoe: awe! does she like younger men cuz I know of a super cute boy
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I'm starting to think she has a posterior tongue-tie. The lactation consultant said that she didn't have a tongue-tie but she only looked at the front and didn't actually feel for one. Most of the symptoms match except she's not losing weight and I found out that my brother-in-law and father-in-law both had tongue-ties and FIL had a lip tie. We have another appointment today and I'm hoping that'll take another look.
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@ms.janedoe: you are superwoman.
Wahhhh I don't want to go back to work tomorrow!!! I think I am going to be a crier.
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@ms.janedoe: ps she looks like you!
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@ms.janedoe: awww! so cute!
cute picture!
Needless to say we picked up some more sposies for nighttime use until I figure out which diaper or combination of inserts work for her overnight. No one has time to change the sheets 5x a night.
I am going to make a weight check appointment before the 4 month one to see how she's doing. Her diaper counts still seem fine, so who knows. Comotomo are the bottles we use, too!
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