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@StrawberryBee: I'm sorry to hear about your dog's injury, but so relieved that the insurance is going to help out!! Good for you buying pet insurance!
@JamieLee: and @Grace: No, I definitely do not see either of these people often enough that they would know if I didn't have their gifts anymore. I guess I was just wondering about the principal of the matter. I've decided to keep the stool, it's small enough that we can tuck it away then our baby can decide if he wants to keep it (which he probably will lol). I don't know what to do with the clothes. Maybe someone on this thread would want them? They're super cute - I'll post a picture later if I remember. A bunch of pink and blue Carter's cupcake onesies - they're all newborn sized.
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@.twist.: Our office is 11ftx11ft, and we only cleared out a quarter of it so don’t get too jealous yet. Haha!
@lawbee11: Nice!! Glad to hear the quality is better than you hoped for!
@StrawberryBee: OMG! I was reading your post and nearly had a heart attack looking at all those charges!! Good call on your end on getting her pet insurance last year; and even better news they’re covering the MRI and surgery!! Sorry to hear your sheltie is in pain, but relief is on the way (for both of you!!!)!!!
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@Mrs Hedgehog: Sorry to hear your shower isn't until July! There are definitely benefits to waiting though, the excitement will really start to be building at that point. The reason I wanted to have mine so early was because my cousin is getting married July 27th, so that would have been difficult for my family to attend my shower, her shower and her wedding all around the same time.
If I were you, I would go ahead and make all of the important purchases now that you're pretty sure no one will splurge for at your shower. Most of my big ticket items were untouched while all the smaller things $30-$60 are totally gone from the registry. Looking back, I probably only should have put one or two 'big ticket' things and just purchased the others myself.
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@Mrs Hedgehog: That would give me some serious anxiety too, especially looking at all these posts that people just want to buy clothes.
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Wow! We are a bunch of chatty ladies! I love this thread! I want to respond to everyone, but that would certainly be a long post.
Thrilled to hear about successful showers! And sorry to hear about stressful ones. I always felt awkward at the idea of any kind of event shower (i.e. my own wedding shower). My best friends are putting on a small friend one for me on the 16th. One of them just had her own little guy two days ago (he's beautiful - DH and I visited them at the hospital and they're looking wonderful and happy)! I feel bad that she's planning but have been constantly reassured that this is what they want to do. But, it's funny because at the same time - you look forward to the showers (esp. this baby shower) with hopes of help with needed items. So, @.twist.: I totally feel you.
@StrawberryBee: I also have a pet cat with a pre-existing condition so I am NO stranger to giant vet bills. So glad that you have insurance on the pups! Good for you. I hope the doggie feels better soon! Also, sorry to hear that you are so stressed about the shower. I can relate to the feelings of anxiety and I'm sure you'll feel a lot better once you've settled down in a comfy chair with a cupcake or slice of cake and cute presents to open!
@Modern Daisy: Oh! I bet the gender reveal was fantastic! I wish I had been able to keep mine a secret. Glad to hear it was a success.
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@Modern Daisy: I definitely could be interested in buying them off you!
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@Mrs D: Oh no way! They are not for sale, I will just mail them
Send me a message on FB with your address and I'll do it this week. I'm actually overdue for paying it forward because I got a free latte yesterday for no reason so this will make me feel better lol!
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@JamieLee: Thanks! My last pet-related breakdown was the cat who lives with my mother (technically mine, but hasn't really been so in the last 5 years). His organs were starting to fail because he stopped eating/was throwing up and I was a mess because the surgery to install the feeding tube was tons of money.
So glad to hear that your pup was okay and that the tumor was easily removed.
@Grace: I need to look into carter's return policy. A lot of of our clothing gifts were from there and I think I read on HB that they accept things back at any time (but maybe that's only with receipt?). Maybe this weekend I can go through, write thank you notes, and organize everything.
@Mrs D: interesting, I didn't know French bulldogs had back issues! Just went and educated myself on it.
@Modern Daisy: @Alivoo01: @greenebee: Thanks! I have an appointment tomorrow with the neurologist. I just feel better doing something than sitting around and waiting for her to get better or fully destroy her back/spinal cord/neurological function. Fingers crossed for good news. I feel so bad for her. I keep on telling her she's a good girl.
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@StrawberryBee: oh terrible back problems...its been so sad to watch them go through it but they are both happy little doggies now!
As for the carters return policy - I had just looked it up (@Modern Daisy: it may help you too since your stuff is carters as well I think)...this is what it says:
"Returns or Exchanges Without an Original Sales Receipt
For in-store returns or exchanges without a receipt, a store credit in the amount of the current sales price of the merchandise will be awarded. All credits will be offered in the form of a Merchandise Credit that can be used at Carter’s or OshKosh B’gosh retail stores. To return your online purchases by mail for a refund, please include your name, billing address, phone number, order number (if known), and reason for return."
AFM - I have my glucose test tomorrow - I need all the luck I can get - I am definitely nervous!
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@Mrs D: The clothes are Carters brand but they were purchased at Kohls. Even if there was a Kohls near us I still wouldn't go through the trouble for such a small amount honestly since it's such a hassle for us to get out to the stores. This is one of the big reasons why I only linked to items sold by Amazon and Buy Buy Baby on my registry - because I get free UPS returns with Amazon and there is a BBB really convenient to me. Maybe if I had more things to return from Kohl's I'd do it, but for a few onesies it just isn't worth it.
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@Modern Daisy: I know what you mean - I am the same way about returns! I'll message you my address - and I promise to pay it forward as well!
Edit: Ok I couldn't send you a message on facebook (not sure how all the privacy stuff works these days) but I added my address to our "names" document on the facebook group!
I just realized since I haven't disclosed my gender to everyone maybe I will get some boy clothes I can pay it forward with!
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@Mrs D: Good luck on the test. I got my results back today and JUST failed it (like 0.5 over). I totally thought I'd have to do the three-hour, which I was not impressed with. She hemmed and hawed and decided to just get me testing blood sugar at home to see if it stays within limits. I'm going to treat it as my science experiment.
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@Grace: That sucks! I was only .1 over though, and it has turned into a fairly serious issue, so glad they're looking into it further!
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Ladies...wondering what your DH's plans are for paternity leave? Are they taking a fixed amount of time? (I know some of our Canadian laides have different rules then us so please enlighten me!) Do you have someone else planning to come stay with you and help you out?
For us, I think the plan will be for DH to "work" remotely for the first week we are home. He's an attorney (and his dad is basically his "boss" as he is the partner on all his cases) so he has lots of flexibility however he also has meetings/court appts he simply cannot miss - so if he has to go he has to go. I've informed my mom I'd love for her to just be around with me during the day and help me our when DH does start going back to work during the day. I'm pretty much a novice with babies (DH too!) having never babysat growing up and really only babysat my nephew a few times but all after he was 6 mos old...so we are total newbies and are hoping we just "pick it up"
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@Mrs D: DH is self employed and makes his own hours, so we'll be able to play it by ear. Goal is for him to be a SAHD
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@Mrs D: My husband has about two weeks that he can take off when the baby comes. The problem for him will be getting everything set up so that he can just drop his work and head home with me (he's a pastor, so he has to find someone to run programs, etc). But he already works from home Mondays and Fridays, so it'll be nice just to have him around.
Also - hope your glucose test goes well!
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@Mrs D: My husband is planning to take a week off when the baby is born but then he will have to go back to work. My good friend works in the schools so hopefully she will still be on break and will be able to come stay with my for a couple days too. My ILs live close as well, so I'm sure my MIL will want to come help. My dad also took a week off in mid August to come see us too. I'm sure if my mom were still alive she'd come stay with me for like a month...lol. She loved babies. I'm also hoping we just sort of "pick it up" as well...
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@Mrs D: DH is self employed so he can kind of make his own hours. We haven't really talked about what his plan is but I know he'll be home for at least the first week. My mom is also going to be coming by during the days to help clean and cook and let me nap.
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@.twist.: @StrawberryBee: How lucky you are to have DH's that are self employed! So much flexibility! Do you have dedicated spaces in the house that are their offices? So they can get "away" while you are home with the newborn? DH has been worrying about where he'll take conference calls when he has a screaming baby in the house!
Especially since we gave up our office for the nursery!@redsmarties: Different careers - but same problem for DH...somethings he just cant hand over easily. And, given the nature of his job he is to some extent always "on call" if something comes up!
@JamieLee: Honestly - I just dont think DH could handle much more than a week at home with me and the baby! I think he'll be a great dad - but I think he will appreciate being able to get out of the house and go back to work!
I met with HR yesterday and it went well. I was happy to find that the first of my 6 weeks of STD is paid at 100% before it drops to 60%! Yay! Has anyone found out what they have to pay for insurance coverage during their FMLA leave? I am terrified to see the cost....
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@Mrs D: Good luck! You'll be great!
My husband plans on two weeks paternity leave...wish it could be more!
Ladies, how can I find our FB group? I'd love to join if that's ok.
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@Mrs D: Hubby owns/runs our business so there won't be a paternity leave for him. Sad face. He'll be working normal business hours (2am till 2pm), and then coming home to help me out. My parents are coming down to visit for 2 weeks so their help will be great! I look forward to my dad's cooking, I miss it! Ha!
I meet with HR next week to discuss FMLA/STD. I'm nervous!!
@greenebee: I think @lawbee11: has to send you an invite.
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@Mrs D: We haven't quite worked it out... We have to give 8 weeks notice if we want to take a parental leave (and 2 weeks notice if you want to come BACK from maternity/parental leave earlier than a year), so we're semi playing it by ear. I've put in that I'm taking the whole year off. However, if an absolutely prime job comes up for post and I win it (There's a particular woman that I've been waiting for her to retire for 5 freakin' years, but she just won't quit even though she's been there for 43 years), or DH just decides he really wants to take some of the time with the baby I may go back early. We've discussed him taking the last three months of leave. His company tops up to 93% of his salary for up to 35 weeks of parental leave, so without OT (he's a police officer - they work LOTS of OT) it would work out to about the same hit to the pocket book as me being off on just the $485/week EI pays for maternity/parental leaves. Or we could take some of the weeks concurrently, which means we're both back to work and baby is in day care a little earlier, but might be nice to have a month or two off all together. Other than that, right when baby's born he's planning to use three to four weeks vacation/banked OT/family care depending how much I feel like I need him/he wants to be there right away as opposed to saving it for future months.
soooooo... our plan is no plan, obviously. Haha. -
@Mrs D: Oh, sorry about that! I don't even know what my privacy settings are since I only use FB mobile 98% of the time. I must have changed it at some point and totally forgotten about it. I'll look for your address tonight and send the package this weekend!
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@Sapphiresun: Booo! Didn't want to hear that!
Actually, I've done two readings so far and they are waaaaaay below the limit, so hopefully this will just be an annoyance rather than a problem.@Mrs D: Hubs has a stupid amount of vacation time saved up, so he's taking two weeks when baby gets here. Then, we're thinking that we'll split the paternity leave and he'll take the last two months off (I'll take the first 10).
@Sapphiresun: I didn't know you could take time off at the same time. Not sure I'd do it, because I'd like to keep LO out of daycare as long as possible, but that's an interesting idea.
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So annoyed! Maybe I shouldn't be, because I've been pretty lucky so far. But I just submit a request for my remaining time off for midwife appointments, and was told that since I gain one vacation day per month, I'm maxed out and have to take all remaining time off as unpaid.
Plus, company policy says that all absences have to happen in half-day increments... So I'll be taking two full unpaid days just to go to midwife appts! Waiting on an email back to find out what happens to the vacation that is accrued while I am on mat leave!Ugh- just frustrated. Shouldn't be- it could be worse. But oh well.
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@Grace: @StrawberryBee: Thanks! I feel much better today, though I am still really congested.
@StrawberryBee: Sorry to hear about your dog, but thank goodness for pet insurance! I am sure that's such a relief.
@Mrs D: Hope your glucose test went well! My DH is a professor so he doesn't get paternity leave (and my EDD is the Friday before his classes start....great timing, eh?). But he only teaches 2 days/week anyways, so he'll be home with me and the baby 3 days/week, He'll actually be staying home with her part-time when I go back to work. He can cancel a class or two so if baby is late it's fine, but I am really hoping she decides to arrive on time or even a few days early!
@greenebee: Email me at lawbee11@gmail.com and we'll get you in (include your HB username in the subject line so I know it's you and not a lurker)!
I had an appt this morning and everything looks perfect! Heartbeat was 150, blood pressure is good, and my fundal height was 30 cm (I'll be 30 weeks on Friday) so the OB was pleased. We have our 3D/4D re-do this Friday...I hope baby decides to cooperate this time!
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@redsmarties: Oh, I'd be frustrated. Especially because it doesn't take all morning to see the midwife. They are not being very accomodating.
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@redsmarties: Gosh - that is frustrating! I hope that the absenses work out for your maternity leave!
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@Grace: sorry, not to be Debbie Downer about it. Hopefully it's nothing! Did they just give you the home glucose meter? Hopefully all your numbers just stay in range and there's no problem! In bc at least we are allowed to take the time concurrently, but keeping out of day care (at $1400/month in my area - yikes!) is definitely in our interests as well. I just don't know about letting dh have the last few months because I'm kind of a terrible person... And I'm like "so, I get to be pregnant, give birth, manage the first few high maintenance months alone, be cooped up all winter in a tiny condo going stir crazy because its too cold/rainy to go outside and then HE gets the entire summer off with a fun 9 month old??".
@redsmarties: boo. Mines pro-rated and I dont gain any vacation time while on mat leave. But they dump my whole 4 weeks in my bank jan 1 so I've been doing the math to not end up owing. Buuuut I've also just been kind of slipping away to attend drs appts without taking any leave and making up the hours as I go black book. -
@redsmarties: That sucks they make you take time off to go to your doctor appointments!!
@lawbee11: Yay for a good dr appointment and for the 3D picture redo!
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@Sapphiresun: I know. I was teasing. :P. I did get a home glucose kit, but I don't have to change my diet yet, so I'm goimg to experiment to see what different foods do to me.
LOL! That's completely my dilemma (re, letting DH take the last two months), but there are three really good pluses if he does take the time: he's got 100% top-up (works for the feds), him being forced to be primary caregiver will hopefully help to keep us even in the parenting role (or even-ish?) and apparently, it's waaay easier going back to work knowing that baby is with dad rather than with strangers in the daycare.
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@Mrs D: He doesn't have a professional career, so doesn't really have need of an office, if that makes sense. He does do phone calls with customers, but they're pretty informal and can occur at any time, so if he can't take the phone call just then he'll just call them back. We're honestly not sure how much work he'll be able to do once I'm back full time.
It's my understanding that I pay the same for insurance as I am now (the policy doesn't change just because I'm out on FMLA. Well, it goes from two married individuals to a family plan so it will go up, but I know what the premium difference is), but instead of it coming out of my paycheck automatically, since technically short term will be paying me for six weeks, I have to remember to pay it myself while I'm out. That'll be fun, I'm sure.
Or do you mean what your company puts in for you you're responsible for while you're out? That would suck, because that's like $800 a month extra! Though I think that would only be during the short term disability timeframe (4 weeks).
My brain hurts.
@redsmarties: that really, really sucks. Talk about sticking it to the pregnant women :(.
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Update on the pup! We had our consult with the neurologist this morning. He does not feel that she requires an MRI or surgery at this time since she is improving on the meds. As long as she continues to improve on them nothing further will need to be done except taking it easy, no jumping or stairs for 4-6 weeks. If she starts to backslide then we'll need to look into something further.
However, no more agility, ever :(. The risk of her re-injuring her spine is too great. At least we got her championship in September.
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@StrawberryBee: Ya - so the impression I got from my HR lady was that we pay the company costs for healthcare while on leave (FMLA portion not STD portion). Maybe I misunderstood - I'll ask a few ladies here and see what I can find out.
That great news the pup is doing better! Bummer about the agility but like you said - at least she is already a champ!
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@Mrs D: DH plans on taking two weeks of his vacation time. I wish I could have him home for longer, but I'll take what I can get.
@StrawberryBee: Glad to hear some good news about the pup! Hoping she continues to improve!
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@Mrs D: That would seriously suck! When I asked my benefits contact in HR she originally told me that "You do not have access to anything while on FMLA. You would need to contact your supervisor so that they can submit time for you if you wish to use any accrued time off. If you are submitting accrued time off, you will continue to have your normal deductions taken."
Which is what led me to believe that FMLA when taking accrued time works the same way as if I was taking a two month vacation. Still get normal paychecks, normal deductions for 401k, medical, etc. If it doesn't it will be fun coming up with $2400 :/.
I'll need to ask her. I don't understand why they don't have a handout to pass out to people going on maternity leave -- it seems to me it would make life a lot simpler!
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@Mrs D: I agree that a week is about all DH could take. He gets bored really easily and I'm thinking even a week is going to leave him antsy to get out and work!
@Alivoo01: what kind of business do you guys own? I thought I remember something about a bakery, which would make sense with those hours...
@Sapphiresun: you're in Canada right? Your leave policies sound so family friendly...wish the US would get with the rest of the world and start supporting working parents. Also totally agree that your DH having the summer off with baby sounds unfair!
@redsmarties: that's a load of BS! That really sucks that they'll make you take a whole half day unpaid for an appointment that will probably take an hour or less...
@StrawberryBee: so glad to hear your fur baby will likely avoid surgery! That stinks about the agility though. And when I was interviewing for a position a few months ago, they told me I would have to pay the company paid portion of my health care while on maternity leave...which was 100% unpaid...which was why I didn't take the job...lol.
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So I was registry stalking just now and we have three bigger ticket items purchased! Someone bought our Jumperoo, swing, and our carseat! I was really not expecting the big items to be purchased. I'm so relieved about the car seat because I was SURE we would have to buy that.
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@Grace: That's pretty good. If I could give him three months off say, Feb-April, and then go back off for May-August I'd be ALL for it. I'd love for him to have some time to be primary care giver, but not get all the best bits. haha. I'm afraid I'll come home every day and he'll be like, "oh we just hung out in the pool all day... again."
@StrawberryBee: Glad the puppy is doing ok!
@StrawberryBee: A hand out would make sense for sure. I got mine packet in the interoffice today explaining what dates were approved by HR (August 7-Dec 4 Mat, Dec 5-Aug 6 parental) and what benefits are being paid by who in what percentage and total amounts and all the paperwork I have to fill out once the baby is born.
@JamieLee: Yeah, we're in Canada. I guess we pay much higher taxes than you guys do, but this is one time (of many) that I'm thankful for our more socialist perspective. I will TRY to remember that next time welfare Wednesday rolls around and a client tells me it's "too nice a day to be working!".
Glad to hear somebody's getting some of the gear they actually need/want from their registry! -
@JamieLee: Yay! Score on your registry stalking! Thats great!
Actually, I've done two readings so far and they are waaaaaay below the limit, so hopefully this will just be an annoyance rather than a problem.
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