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@skipra: I think its okay if they drop a bit earlier than expected. My niece is also pregnant due on May 1st and her boy dropped since week 30 of her pregnancy. She is also in so much pain and there is still no baby.
@whodat: I hear you on the hiccups! at first it was like "awe he got it for the first time and so cool I can feel it" and now is more like "boy you need to cool it, I get it!" ... haha! It can be too much especially when I am trying to sleep.
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@Glitter: I got pregnant this time around, having not had a period yet due to nursing, and DH deciding since we were on vacation, he wouldn't pull out lol. J2 was 16 months old though.
@Beebug: Oh no! We were sick a couple weeks ago and it awful. Like there isn't already enough going on with our big preggo bodies. I hope you feel better fast.
@twodoghouse: My mother in law wants to go away for the weekend and keeps asking if I think I'm going to have the baby. How the heck do I know?
@skipra: I dropped a week ago or so. You could tell in my weekly pictures. I still feel cramped and can't breathe but when I stand there's a bigger gap between the bottom of my breast and my belly than in previous pics.
Is breastfeeding an effective form of bc? Only if the following applies: First 6 months of babies life, baby must be nursing every 2-3 hours, with no long gaps including over night, no solids introduced, and no return of af. If all of that applies then it's 98.9% effective. After 6 months it's a crap shoot
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@Glitter: I LOVE the pill! That's what I'm going back to. It makes me skinny with clear skin and light periods. Works for me! And I had zero problems getting pregnant after I got off of it. We still want one more. After that I may get my tubes tied. DH and I appear to be pretty fertile so I want something that I know works. IUDs kinda freak me out.
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@Mamasig: Which particular BC pill did you take?! I had better experiences with some than others, and we are also trying to figure out how to handle the BC thing post-baby.
@Mae: For what it's worth, I had the Mirena IUD. Not only did insertion go poorly and it had to be removed and re-inserted, but it never got 'comfortable' and I felt it whenever I did cardio, and sex hurt. I also started to gain weight with it. I got rid of it for good after maybe four or five months. I have many friends who swear by it, but it just wasn't right for me.
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@gingerblonde: I think mirena is off the table for me because it is hormonal which is exactly what I DON'T want after hating the pill. I was considering a copper IUD but so many people say they bleed a lot on that... plus the migration/implantation issues
Honestly I think it will probably come down to a combo of condoms and P&P for us. It just sucks because we both hate condoms so much... but I'm just not sure that I'm comfortable with P&P when we truly do not want to wind up pregnant. I know it is supposed to work well if done correctly and it did work for us for a whole year until the first time we messed it up. But it just doesn't feel like a real birth control method lol.
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@Mae: My BFF has had the copper IUD for years and years. She is extremely happy with it, by and large, because of the lack of hormones, but she does admit that she has pretty awful periods with lots of bleeding. I wish there was an easy hormone-free method... I went so far as to get a diaphragm last year. Talk about awkward. It was a tremendous mood-killer and I never felt like I could do it right, and spermicidal lubricant is pretty gross.
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@Mae: P&P is basically how we ended up pregnant too. I stopped taking hormonal birth control because I felt like it was wreaking havoc on my moods. We had been keeping really good track of my fertility and I'm very regular... I don't know how it happened, exactly. Well... I know how it happened.
You know what I mean. It makes me reluctant to rely on it again.My pregnancy has been a little difficult. We had initially planned to space our kids close together, but now I have definitely had a change of heart. With that in mind, we need a BC method stat and I feel as conflicted as you do. If you come up with the magical answer outside of P&P and the dreaded condoms, please let me know!
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@gingerblonde: It was called zenchent fe chewable. Not sure if that's a generic or what. Also, my 2nd pregnancy has been a hundred times easier than my 1st even though I have GD this time. You just never know! Trust me, I was scared! But it's worked out.
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@gingerblonde: Lol if I find the magic answer I'll let you know. I also considered the diaphragm but yes to awkward and also I'm allergic to spermacide
Also I totally feel you on the child spacing thing. I am so torn on this issue. I think we want 2. And a big part of me wants to plan to TTC right at 1 year pp to get the whole pregnancy/diapers/birth control time of our lives over with. We both feel pulled towards completing our family and moving on because this in between time feels like limbo. But on the other hand, omg I don't wanna do it again. lol. And my pregnancy has been about as easy as it ever is, I think? But I just don't wanna. I'm almost done and I can't IMAGINE starting over at the 1st trimester again. And I haven't even dealt with diapers yet! lol. Luckily (I guess) we really don't have to/can't decide for a while anyways.
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@Mae: Funny thing about having the baby is that you forget about pregnancy/labor. Sleep deprivation and hormones make you do funny things...like get pregnant again!
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@skipra: when I read what @Mae: wrote I thought "give it a year, you'll forget all about this" lol
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@skipra: @junebugmama: I hope so! I think part of my fear comes from the fact that we never TTC for this one. Like, I never got baby fever. I did think I wanted kids at some point, and we had discussed being okay with an "oops".. but I never made the leap to "I actually want to do this now" until I saw that second line. It was always more like "yea I want it but ugh pregnancy and baby-hood... let's wait another year." So I guess I've always felt slightly defective since I never really got the urge to TTC, and I'm worried that even though I do think I want 2 kids I'll never get that urge to actually TTC. Which I guess if I never do I never do and we'll be one and done
But yea.... it will be interesting to see what happens haha.
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@Mae: I actually understand where you are coming from. We were not planning for this one. As a matter of fact, we conceived on the day that DH had originally had a vasectomy scheduled. We had gone back and forth about having a 3rd (my bio 2nd) and so I felt differently about this pregnancy in a way, since it wasn't really my choice.
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@junebugmama: I guess I have nothing to compare to! I mean it's weird because I am SUPER excited about this baby and I feel like getting pregnant the way I did was like, the best thing that ever happened to us. I know we're super lucky to have it fall in our laps without ever stressing about it, and once we knew she was coming we felt like this was absolutely "meant to be." But that doesn't mean that I am a fan of pregnancy (even my easy one lol).
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@Mae: We felt the same way. We really talked about wether or not to have another for over a year, so when it happened, without the stress of TTC, we felt like it was really meant to be. The first time we had multiple miscarriages and then it took 8 months after those to get pregnant, so this way certainly felt like a blessing or something
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I don't know what I want to do for bc either. This is it for us and DH is planning to have a vasectomy but not sure what to do before that. Last time we just relied on bf and were ok with whatever happens happens since we knew we wanted another soon. @iluvpink: like you I figured what were the chances if conceiving on our own since our first required treatment but I got AF back 10 months postpartum and was pregnant 12 months postpartum.! A shock but a good one :
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We will probably just use condoms (blech) and I will chart my cycle. That is what we did after R was born. I got my period back 5 weeks pp so I didn't have a break from that.
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@sungirl: wow really?! This actually gives me so much hope. I am so thankful that IUI worked for us but I was not happy with the injections, you know. Its just not how I pictured to get pregnant, so knowing that your second one was natural, gives me and DH lots of hope. Thank you for sharing
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@Mae: I wouldn't worry too much about it yet! We didn't really TTC for DS either, it just kind of happened. I never had baby fever and DH and I were ok with not ever having kids and were under the impression that we'd need fertility treatment to get pregnant so I went off the pill and we just risked it. Then after having DS I wanted like 10 more babies. I swear, those mommy hormones are powerful things.
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@twodoghouse: How annoying that people are wanting answers from you about the unknowable! The people in our life who are most baffled about the not-knowing are DH's female co-workers, who all had scheduled cesareans. They just don't understand why he can't commit to travel or major new projects in the month ahead. He just keeps saying, "even in the Manhattan corporate world, sometimes nature prevails!"
@whodat: Lots of hiccups here, too. Like 2-3 times a day? I think it's normal. Another weird thing we've had though is this slower, rhythmic movement near the baby's rear end. DH and I can't decide if thumbsucking is a possibility? Our first thought was masturbation... which Dr Google says does happen!
@Glitter: We're a dedicated symptothermal NFP/FAM family. I have irregular cycles and irregular sleep (shift work), and it's the only method I've ever used. I was always diligent about it and conservative in my application of the rules, but I'm a big believer almost an evangelist for the method, if that's possible. Never an oops and we got pregnant the first try once we reversed the rules to TTC. Definitely worth a look if pull and pray is the alternative.
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@Mae: I knew the spot I had to back track to in catching up was your nursery pic, holy crap it looks AWESOME!!! So excited for you, and what amazing work you have put into it!! Love!!!!
@cookie_dough: Sorry to hear about DHs Grandfather, I know you had mentioned it might be coming, the travel/friction of distance part makes it so hard. Hope solo-mama'ing goes okay and DD doesn't give you a run for your money.
@junebugmama: 8lbs already! Wow, I know those measurements can be off, but know you have mentioned knowing you will likely have a big babes, 8lbs just seems crazy big though.
@skipra: Great news on the growth u/s, and so cool about him looking like DS at this point, that is amazing! When I got to secretly see this one for the few moments, the cheeks and nose really reminded me of DD!!
@cookie_dough: Any progress (hopefully not) on DD and hand, foot, and mouth? I used to get it all the time (as an adult, early 20's, so weird)
@Mae: We won't have an u/s again (and haven't since 20w aside from the private one I paid for) unless we go overdue and will go for a biophysical one at 40+6 or so. Did it with DD while in early/getting to active labour, laying for u/s through contractions was not the most fun I've ever had!
@iluvpink: I have heard of puppp before, one of my Oct 2012 Momma's got it near the end of her pregnancy, she showed us pics I believe, was kind of crazy, and definitely went away, hopefully it doesn't bug you too much!
@twodoghouse: Confession on questions from family members.....most of our family and friends (with exception to siblings, parents, grandparents, great-grandparent) think we are due end of May/early June, lol. We were hounded with DD, especially by friends and it drove me crazy. I am perfectly comfortable going overdue, and the phone calls, fb messages, texts, etc about drove me nuts. To a point where I wouldn't even check my phone, when DH would come home from work he would go through it all for me and leave for me what was normal stuff from whoever and not the crazy. So we said we'd tell a white lie this time with a later due date to deter the crazy around due date time.....we hope!!
I am back at work today and feel 100% normal, so weird, and apparently all the vomiting gave me my voice back too? I joked to a colleague this morning that maybe this 24 hour stomach flu thing was the grand finale and I'm finally not going to be sick for weeks on end, I can dream, right?
Back to bc talk, I was SO frustrated with #1, I ebf'ed her for 4 months, my period was back 6w post partum. I was SO bummed. So really didn't think through the birth control stuff, my doc and one of my good friends both had great Mirena stories, so I just went with it, we know our TTC timeline didn't really make sense with Mirena, but it seemed like a low maintenance option and our benefits covered the costs completely, so in it went. I have no idea if the side effects were because of it, or because it was where it wasn't supposed to be, will never know! I still want to take a pic of bare belly and the scar, just not brave enough!
This convo really made me think (I skimmed it last night so thought then and today) is I really have no idea if we'll have more kids. The relationship stuff, the life stuff that DH and I have gone through this pregnancy especially has really made me question having more. I would like....1-2 more I think, but is it the best for us, for our family? Maybe not. DH is probably in the same boat, he'd probably say 1-3 more, but I just don't know if we can do it. So I struggle thinking "are these the last few weeks I will be pregnant ever?" and then thinking, when would we TTC for #3 if so, clearly all too much to think about right now, but figuring out solid bc will be important until time comes where we do discuss our families future.
Was supposed to have doc appt today, and GBS test but I cancelled as it is early afternoon which take me out of the office for most of the afternoon with travel to/from appt and I have to get DD at end of day since DH is coaching after school, with two days missed work, I resched'ed for Monday.
My boss emailed me asking when they could do a lunch thing for me, said she knows I will be annoyed if they try to surprise me (very correct, lol) and they wanted to do it this week but cancelled with me being sick. I thought people didn't do things for #2? Grrr, lol.
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@Beebug: I am glad you are feeling better
I hate those 24 hour stomach flu/bug ! I got it only once in my lifetime when I was in college and it can certainly knock you out.....Its very nice that they are doing something for you at work. I don't blame you for not wanting to be surprised. I don't like surprises either haha -
@Beebug: she doesn't seem to have much of a rash, just a few dots around her mouth. But she is so so so cranky the last few days...so she definitely might be feeling a bit under the weather
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@cookie_dough: DD is still mega cranky trying to bust some teeth through. It's creepy, the two teeth beside the front, top two are every bit right there, just with skin over them, it looks gross. Hope they poke through soon! That'll bring her to six teeth, so pathetically slow, lol.
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@Beebug: Ya, I think teething could have to do with it two! She has a few teeth that are partially in, and it's looking pretty painful! I hope it doesn't last too long for your DD. I can't believe it's your last week of work already! My last day will be May 2...I feel like maybe it's a bit early since I'm not due till the 18th? My boss kind of gave me a funny look when I said that would be my last day.
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@Beebug: At first when they said 8 lbs I thought they had lost their minds. However, I was 34wks and 3 days at my appointment. They say that babies grow a half a pound per week at the end. I had J2 at 36w and 5d and he was 8.15 which means he would have been around 8lbs at this same time. So actually very possible for me. Still seems totally insane to think he's already that big though.
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@cookie_dough: My first day of mat leave is May 5th! Technically my last day is the 2nd, too! But I'm actually on vacation/using lieu time until then. So many people are popping in to my office today saying "it still feels like you just got back" eeep, stop reminding me! haha, I so don't want to cry.
@junebugmama: Crazy on size! I wonder how big this one will be compared to DD, so excited to eventually know all the unknowns! So long as they're all healthy!!
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@junebugmama: Honestly if they told me that my baby was 8 pounds I would have been like "OK, I'm done! Get him out now. No use staying in there any longer."
That's why I am kind of not wanting to have a 36 week ultrasound -- last time they told me DS was 7.5 lbs and his lungs were ready, and I was like....and I'm waiting another month to have him why??
Did they induce you last time or did he come on his own?
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@whodat: I had preeclampsia last time and had an induction. He was not ready to come out, so he fought every intervention until 74 hours into it, when he made his appearance. I'm afraid to have another induction after how the last one went. I was in the hospital for 7 days last time. This time I'm not having any complications though. They are just concerned about his size.
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@Beebug: Thanks! And LOL about lying about your due date. You're an excellent secret keeper with this pregnancy
And it is so nice your coworkers want to do something, even for #2! So I had my 36 week appointment today and it was awesome. I DID get to keep my pants on for the GBS test (self-serve) so that was happy. Also it was the first appointment my husband has come to since my 24 week appointment and the midwife was showing him where all the baby parts are and having him feel for the head and the butt and the legs and that was all very cool. Then she took out a marker and drew a picture of the baby on my stomach to show how she is laying. I wish my stomach was prettier so I could take a pic for you but I'm not nearly that brave haha. Still awesome for us to see though! We also went through my birth plan and she approved everything on there, so that was great! So glad particularly that I get to labor in my own clothes and drink as much as I want and not have to be hooked up to an IV or monitor (I can opt to have 20 min monitoring when I go in to verify baby is okay, then just intermittent monitoring every 30 min rather than continuous). The idea of being stuck in bed in a hospital gown eating ice chips stresses me out haha. So over all it was just awesome and I'm getting really excited to meet our LO!
The only slightly negative thing was she REALLY pushed me (again) to take a breastfeeding class. I feel like she's being a little overly dramatic about it. She said something akin to "Breastfeeding is a SKILL just like tennis. It's a game you MUST WIN. Imagine you had a game of tennis coming up in 4 weeks and you had never played before, and the health of your baby for the rest of its life depended on you winning that game. Would you just read a book and watch a youtube video about how to play? Or would you take a lesson?" Which like... okay I get the skill comparison. But I think it's a bit dramatic to make it sound like if I do fail at breastfeeding my baby's health is ruined. And also, I just haven't heard good things from people who have taken the class that it was actually helpful. But of course I can't say that to her. So I don't know.
But anyways. Mostly awesome appointment this morning!
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@junebugmama: Wow, I don't blame you for not wanting another induction. But it seems like since you've already had a big baby, you'll be able to handle another one even if he's bigger. I'd just be worried about tearing, ouch!
I saw someone on the April (maybe March?) board had a 10+ pound baby vaginally recently.
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@whodat: lol on "okay I'm done".
@Mae: Boo about the bf course pressure. Seriously do what you want, I still stand by that nothing I learned beforehand mattered, it all was a learning process once that little one was up against me. Anything else was awkward and foolish feeling beforehand, but that's just me!
Soooo I just signed paperwork to confirm my unpaid leave after my mat leave. Officially I return to work August 4, 2015. Holy crap, I am not even going to remember what I do by then
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@Mae: Yay for the 36 week appointment! Are they ever going to do a cervical check or just wait until labor? Not that it really matters.
FWIW I never took a breastfeeding class before my first, and had no problems with it. The hospital had a lactation consultant and also the nurses were really helpful. I just looked at the La Leche League website whenever I had questions.
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Re: big babies-- I've totally known people who had very big ones! My husband was over 10 lbs and his mother birthed him vaginally with no serious issues. Also a good friend of mine just had a baby in September-- 27 hours of natural labor + meconium in fluid but he came out 10lbs 6oz and both baby and mom were just fine! She had only a small 1st degree tear, and she had not done any perineal massage before, although she said her doc did it during (she had an OB, but one who was super supportive of natural birth). So it is certainly possible
(And she is not a large person!)@Beebug: That's what I've heard from so many people!! I just don't feel like it would be useful for me. But like, there's a big sign up in the lobby of the midwife office counting down to this particular midwife's 1000th delivery (she just had 990 yesterday) so when she says YOU MUST DO THIS it feels hard to be like ummmmmmmm don't wanna. haha.
We did talk about how a big part of breastfeeding is confidence and willingness to stick with it through challenges so I think I at least assuaged her fears about me a little bit there... but yea she said it was her "last efforts to sway me" so maybe at least she won't bring it up again? I see her next week so I guess we'll see hah.
@whodat: Nope, not until I go past 40. We talked about it today and she said they are happy to do them if I am curious, but they don't believe they are medically necessary. She said a lot of women are dilated several centimeters for weeks, so being dilated doesn't really indicate that you're about to go into labor. And at the same time, a lot of women are fully closed and then BOOM labor the next day. She said she feels like mostly it just stresses moms out because they try to guess when they'll go into labor based on the check, when really they don't know any more after the check than they knew before. If I do go past 40 they will do one then I guess though, or at least talk about it.
As for other pre-labor stuff, she does recommend the red raspberry leaf tea I'm drinking, and also EPO (both orally and vaginally). She also said that they can't prove sitting on the yoga ball the month before does anything but she has a gut feeling that hanging out on it and rocking your hips for a bit every night does usually help things get aligned in the right way. Of course none of this makes baby come before she is ready (nor would we want her to) but hopefully doing this sort of stuff will prepare my body to work better when Fiona decides it's time to make her grand entrance
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@Mae: I hate when people try to pressure you! I took a Breastfeeding class before I had DS and it was pointless. Practicing with a doll is not the same thing. I also don't think you truly know how it is until you do it. It just didn't work for me and DS. I was very upset feeling like I failed. Well, DS didn't care how he got fed! I'll try again with this one and see how it goes.
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@Mae: Yay for a good appt, but whoa that sounds a little intense on the BF class pressure! I understand what she's saying and that makes sense, but will your BF class really be the lesson she is making it out to be? I'd ask what the class really entails. Mine was good for meeting an LC, getting comfortable with the breastfeeding resource center, etc. But as far as the BF really goes, it was a lot of video, some handouts, getting to look at pump parts, and holding a doll in a few different positions. In the end it certainly didn't hurt to go, but it also wasn't THAT enlightening.
@junebugmama: Ugh, I'm sorry you're having to deal with this. I'm sure you don't want to be induced so early but 8 lbs already sounds a little scary too! Are there risks associated with him getting so big other than the difficulty with vaginal delivery?
@Beebug: Wow maternity leave in Canada is amazing! I bet it will be nice to have some time with DD before LO2 comes!
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@twodoghouse: the course description says: "Come to a breastfeeding class taught by one of our well-trained Lactation Consultants in the "Art of Breastfeeding". The class reviews the basics on how the breasts' function, supply and demand, how to maintain a milk supply when returning to work and common concerns of mothers. The core of the class evolves around the "how to" breast feed. Discussions on recognizing hunger cues, positioning and attachment strategies, and knowing when your infant is satisfied are some of the areas presented."
Still... I feel like I know the mechanics at this point. Also, I just looked (to get that description) and every class is totally full until June 3 anyways! So ummm couldn't if I wanted to. Although I'd be hesitant to use that as an excuse with her bc she'd prob be like "oh call them they'll fit you in" lol
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@whodat: @Mae: @twodoghouse: I'm actually not worried about having a 10lb baby. I have seen lots of woman do it with no problem. At 12lbs the risk levels for certain things go up, including emergency c-sections. If he stays on pace and is 10.5lbs at 40 weeks and my labor starts naturally, I will have no concerns.
Statistically woman who take a breast-feeding class, are more "successful" than those who don't. I think the stat is sort of a twisted one though, because obviously a woman who took a class is more interested to start than one who didn't in most cases. Some classes are the way they were described, info, slides, practicing with dolls. I do think information is always helpful, especially for your partner. As woman we've done our research, but I bet your spouse hasn't googled a single thing about breastfeeding. I had a very hard time with bf'ing (used donor milk in the beginning) and I don't think hubby would have been as supportive as he was, had he not heard the benefits and stats surrounding bf'ing.
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@junebugmama: Right. I'd imagine there is a good bit of selection bias on this. I also just feel like I've done more research than most probably do. I'm a lawyer. Reading is sort of my thing lol. And I'm very okay asking for help later. I know I'll have LCs as well as the midwives and nurses I can ask questions to. Plus my mom who EBF me and is a huuuge proponent of breastfeeding, and one of my best local friends who breastfed her son until 18 months and has already been so helpful to me in giving me tips. Plus various other friends/cousins of mine who have all been successful in breastfeeding. And my husband is totally on board. He definitely understands why it is important to me and agrees it is what is best for us, and he knows it may be a bumpy ride at first and that "well lets just give her a bottle for now" is not really the answer. So I guess I just feel like... I'll work it out (with help if necessary).
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@Mae: Your appointment sounds like fun, actually! DH feeling baby and her drawing how baby is positioned is awesome! I am glad all went well, aside from the "breast feeding class" ... People, back in the days (like my mother's time) never had classes and they managed just fine. I didn't take one and I personally do not think is that necessary (especially when you are doing research) when my hospital has a lactation consultant on site for me after baby is born. Of course, is a personal thing, but I think you will be just fine! You got this!
Honestly I think it will probably come down to a combo of condoms and P&P for us. It just sucks because we both hate condoms so much... but I'm just not sure that I'm comfortable with P&P when we truly do not want to wind up pregnant. I know it is supposed to work well if done correctly and it did work for us for a whole year until the first time we messed it up. But it just doesn't feel like a real birth control method lol.
You know what I mean. It makes me reluctant to rely on it again.
But yea.... it will be interesting to see what happens haha.
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