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@Beebug: You're not being a downer at all!
Actually that was our first question during the session - What happens in the case of an emergency??For starters they only accept low risk mothers and babies - that is 9 months with no complications. Any issues and you would not qualify to be admitted. However my issue was yeh,, but what if i have a smooth pregnancy but during labour or after something goes completely wrong! Trust me, I can be quite a worrier.
The birth center has a list of doctors that support the center. Their function is to be on call so that in the case of an emergency, they meet you at the nearest hospital which is literally two streets away from the birth center. It would take less than 5 minutes to get to the hospital from the birth center even in a private vehicle. There's also a 24/7 ambulance always at the center. So if there's an emergency, the ambulance takes u to the hospital and one of their on-call doctors meets you there. You can sign up with one of the doctors on the list so that he can be your "backup doctor" or you can simply go with whoever is on call at the time. Fortunately for me, my current doctor is on the list of on-call doctors, so I was advised to inform him that I want to birth at the center and ask him to be my personal backup doctor. Seeing that he already supports the center and has all my medical history in the event that something goes wrong I would be in familiar hands. Your private doula will also accompany you to the hospital if you prefer and continue to encourage you throughout the birthing process, along with your husband/partner/coach. My older sis is also an OBGYN but she lives in another country
I'm really hoping she can be here for the birth so that she too would be in the birthing room with me keeping a close eye on things.
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@Glitter: It sounds like a balanced option to me.
I'm sure the birth center has ample skill and supplies for most birth issues right there - they must be equipped with medications for hemorrhage, newborn resuscitation, etc, right? You'd really only need to transfer for the rarest of rare emergencies. And from what you describe, your transfer from birth center to hospital wouldn't be much longer than from a hospital room to an operating room, so if it were really an absolute urgent emergency and you needed hospital intervention (SO RARE), there's a system in place. Probably your OB wouldn't have time to get there from home, though, if it really were that sort of emergency.
And non-emergent transfer is also an option if you do end up wanting epidural or something, though I think with the doula and all the other options (I've heard great things about TENS), you're probably less likely to need them.
Though, I'm probably biased the opposite way because we seriously considered home birth. Hospitals here are hostile toward transfers from home, though, even non-emergent ones, so we decided not to risk the possible abuse.
In the end, the best place to birth is where you'll feel safest and least worried, so you can just let your body do its thing. Only you really know which option that would be.
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@Glitter: definitely sounds like a great option given proximity to hosp, and awesome about your current doc being on of their back up doctors!
24w bump pic!
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@Beebug: yay bump!
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@Beebug: I like your shirt, looks like it will fit up until due date time.
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@whodat: Thanks!! It better fit the rest of the way!!! It was expensive. I splurged because I loved it so much, and technically I only bought half of it, the other half was part of Christmas gift from my Mom. I try so hard not to buy stuff full price at Thyme Maternity, but this was so nice....work worthy nice, but comfy, too!!
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I still haven't gotten a maternity coat and my jacket is becoming such a squeeze! My bosses wife loaned me a preggo pea coat, so it works for work stuff, but isn't warm at all, but I struggle to spend on a warm coat, I should probably just try DHs big coat on! It was in the -30's here this am when I walked the dog, enough of this bitter cold!
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@Beebug: Hey it looks like all the Thyme maternity stuff is 70% off on Babies R Us, FYI
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@whodat: Oh geez, lol. Maybe US and not Canadian, my wallet hopes so
Thanks!!Edited, our local BRU doesn't have Thyme in store, but a Thyme store is closer to my house, I should just pop in, I find once stuff gets to clearance they never have sizes....
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@Beebug: I think I'm going to raid DH's coat collection soon...soooooo cold...at least with one of his coats, I can wear an extra layer underneath!!!
There's a gap maternity opening up in my city...must stay away!!!
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@cookie_dough: Oh I am envious! I was given some hand me down gap maternity stuff, but gap at the mall here doesn't have maternity so I have never known where I could get it!
DH and I met in your city and it's our anniv next month....haha roadtrip for mat clothes. I am definitely kidding, but I would still take the trip!
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@Beebug: Ya, I just found out today from a friend that it's opening next week apparently! We FINALLY got an H&M a few months ago, and I was so disappointed they didn't have a maternity section. However, I definitely don't need any more mat clothes, especially since this is 99% for sure our last LO. I just have to look at cute baby boy clothes to keep me distracted and away from the maternity clothes!
Anniversary road trip is a must!!
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@cookie_dough: our H and M does have mat clothes, but I never find anything I like or that fits well! DH and I had our first date Feb 14th 5 yrs ago, lol. But we met the week before at a bar called suite 34 or something down in the market! I'm not sure I've been to a bar since, lol. My bday is a week after dating anniv, so those two reasons, plus a #2 baby moon? Haha, it won't happen, but I can dream!
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@Beebug: hahahaha...suite 34!!! ah...memories of my university years
It's actually not called suite 34 anymore, it has a new name...but is still a bar!
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oh, maternity clothes. I think I'm decided against a maternity coat. I have 2 coats. My shorter leather coat I can only button the top 2 of 4 buttons now, but I just wear it anyways lol. Luckily my longer wool coat still fits, but just barely. I'm sure it will not in the next few weeks but I just can't see spending money on a coat I'll wear for like, 1-2 months tops.
As for other maternity clothes I'm torn. I just hate spending money on clothes. Between birthday and Christmas gifts from my mom, and a couple tops I purchased I feel like I should sort of be done for maternity clothes. But I really only have like 7-8 tops and it is a little boring to keep wearing them over and over again. But again-- its only for a few months and I don't have an office job so it feels too indulgent to buy more tops just because I'm bored.
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@cookie_dough: haha I am glad I remembered the name! I know last time (couple yrs anyways) I walked by it was closed completely not even reopened as anything different! I remember being so bitter about going there that night. My friend was chasing this guy and he didn't respond to her texts that night, so we went out anyways to two different bars, he finally responded to her at like midnight when we were at bar #2 and we had been having so much fun at bar #2 my other gf and I were so annoyed gf was asking us to leave to go to a 3rd spot! She offered to pay our cover, coat check and 1st drink just to go so she could see this guy (who ended up being our wedding mc, haha!), so we obliged. DH was one of the friends of the guy my friend was chasing, ended up being well worth it to go there, and they never ended up dating....!! I met DH and his one brother that weekend, some awesome luck!
@Mae: This is a silly question, do you get dressed "for work" every day, even though you work from home?
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@Beebug: Nope! I do change every morning because I sleep in nightgowns. But my work wardrobe is yoga pants and a top. I do try to avoid shlubby "free tshirt" type shirts and opt for v-neck or tank tops or even slightly nicer tops-- just for the sake of my sanity and my husband.
Although at the moment I'm sitting here in a hoodie bc it was cold this morning, so that happens to. If I go out during the day anywhere I'll switch into jeans but I'd say at least 50% of the time I put my yoga pants back on when I get home. I used to feel badly about it but then I brought my husband over to the dark side and he now changes into flannel pj pants the second he gets home from work every day-- so now at least I feel like I have company.
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@Mae: I would definitely do the same if I worked from home. I always change out of my work clothes into sweatpants or pyjama pants the minute I get home. We have two cats, and I HATE sitting around in my nice clothes with cats rubbing all over me. Not to mention DD drooling over me, spilling food on me, etc!
@Beebug: That's an awesome story
Good thing you gave in and went to the third bar! I haven't been out to the market in ages...(well ages for me means last Easter) I used to go almost every weekend before having DD!
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@Mae: DH and I are opposites in how we dress for work. He is a phys ed teacher, so during the week he is in sweats, track pants, hoodies, etc. Weekend he is university hockey coach, so suits and ties. I try to keep my work clothes on for an hour after I get home from work each day just so DH can see me looking half decent, otherwise into sweats I go, weekends I try to look nice comfy, which mat jeans are helpful for, so comfy, ha!!
@cookie_dough: I used to go all the time, still one of my fave cities, and was usually around for work a lot! My gf lived downtown too, and now she is in Almonte so that on top of now with DD and not visiting as much I feel like I am never there any more! Cottage is just under 2 hrs away so we always talk about day tripping in, but never do it! I have a beavertail issue when I go to the market
haha!I would like some baby movement this aft! Got some while still in bed this am, but it's been a quiet day.....reassurance please baby!
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@Beebug: I moved some furniture yesterday and baby kicked the crap out of me for an hour afterwards. So um, maybe jumping jacks or jog a lap around your office? haha
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@Beebug: oh man...beavertails have been one of my big cravings this pregnancy, but I have yet to indulge (not that I haven't been pigging out on chocolate, donuts, anything else sweet like crazy!) Beavertail season is in full force now that the canal is open for skating
Ah yes...definitely more appealing to visit when you have somewhere downtown to stay! Not that Almonte isn't pretty 
As for baby movement, baby W has been lean on the kicks the last few days, but I do feel them every once in a while so I try not to worry. Has it been a whole day of no movement? Or just this aft?
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@Mae: lol on laps. I walked the dog at lunch, you'd think that'd just some solid jostling!
@cookie_dough: This am before I got up for the day I felt movement, but now that I am thinking about it, I haven't felt anything since at work. Hopefully something soon, will try not to worry and start poking the kid here shortly!!
Just cracked a can of pop (I hardly ever drink pop!) so maybe that will spark some movement.
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@Beebug: I know every baby is different but I often don't feel movement during the workday. Most active times are right when I first wake up before I am out of bed, and after dinner until bedtime. Especially if I'm moving around (like running errands or cleaning or if I have a photo shoot and I'm up and down off the floor) she is either quiet or I'm too distracted to notice her.
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@Mae: Yah, I am wondering if maybe I was busy enough this am ( I feel like my office was a revolving door this am!) that I didn't notice! Not worried, will get some movement soon!!!
@cookie_dough: What date are you starting mat leave? I got an email from HR wanting to sched appt for March to get me all set for May, I feel like asking everyone on here is at times unfair when they start mat leave with more limited time off then we do (sorry ladies). There is another Canadian Momma on here, I can't remember her name at the moment. I am thinking May 2nd, or maybe stretch to the 7th, but I just wonder how checked out I will be by then? I didn't work up to my due date with DD.
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@Beebug: I'm still trying to figure that out. With DD, I had a scheduled c-section on July 11. I just didn't go back to work after Canada day, but I used vacation time for my first week off rather than mat leave. My due date this time is May 18. Presuming I have another scheduled c-section, I plan to perhaps take the week before off, and that's it. I really want to maximize the time on the other end (i.e. not having to come back to work earlier than I need to). I tend to sign up for lots of activities (babytime at the library, baby music classes, etc), and most of those will go into June i'm sure, so I might take a few extra weeks off so that I can finish off the session of activities we are signed up for. I'm not too worried about making it in to work in the last few weeks...I did it no problem last time, and it was boiling hot AND i was taking 2 buses to get home. This time it will be spring weather, and I drive to work
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I'm just going to sit in my corner and be jealous now…. lol.
Although to be fair, I am grateful I'm getting 12 weeks paid and then another 4 weeks working with her at home with me, because that is pretty uncommon for america! Sort of feels like my first summer vacation in a decade really, since I'll be off/have her home from May-Sept!
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@cookie_dough: I am betting on going late again, so of course I try to factor that in as well! I know I am taking an unpaid leave on the other end, so whenever mat leave ends, I should have enough vacay to get me to end of June or so (I have like 46 days right now to take....!) and then will take 1 month or so unpaid so I have some summertime with DH and kiddo's, don't want to hand them off as he finishes for the summer and go back to work then. The 2nd or 7th probably really doesn't matter, but heck, every day counts, right?
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@Mae: lol sorry.
I shouldn't even start but two summer's ago I stopped work July 20th on vacay, and then didn't go back to work (had DD in Oct). Had last summer off (mat leave), will have this summer off (another mat leave!) and then half of next summer on extended leave. It's kind of disgusting, but I know I am super lucky.
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@Beebug: how do businesses in canada function with people gone so much? I would think it would be really hard to plan around!
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@Mae: lol! I guess it's just our norm, so it's easy? Most have lots of notice, and we do job postings for 1 year mat leave coverages! Usually someone already in here gets it, then it just ripples from there, ends up benefiting people really.
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@Beebug: i suppose if you have a ton of people out for 1 year at a time at any given time, that means more job openings for everyone else (if only short term)… 2 birds 1 stone… lol. Our national psyche is so messed up when it comes to stuff like mat leave and insurance coverage. I don't understand why americans are so different than the rest of the civilized world when it comes to quality of life issues.
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@Mae: Yep, it usually has a pretty good ripple effect, at least in our office anyways! We have an office of 50 or so, but very different departments (four of them) and we have three out on mat leave right now, I got back in Oct, another in January. One of the three currently out is due back end of this month, but they still aren't sure if she going to come back. I am the only one with a mat leave coming that the office is aware of at this point, lol. In every case whoever has backfilled it has benefited them, and probably unique but where I work is growing like a bad weed so things change so much around here, people end up getting to stay in roles, or roles change in a positive way for people and it all seems to work out.
DH and I talked about US mat leave and how different our family planning would look if we lived in the US! Crazy!
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It's crazy how bad American maternity leave is. I only started staying home because DS was not ready for me to go back to work when my leave was up. Oh well, I love staying home with DS and now there is no question that I'll be staying home with #2 until he's a year at least and daycare is slightly less expensive.
@Mae: I'm with you on the comfy pants. I was wearing my jeans earlier today while we were out but now that we only have to go to the grocery store and DS is napping you better believe I'm in my yoga pants!
@Beebug: You look great! I can't believe you are starting to grow out of your coat already. I am huge compared to last time but luckily don't need a new coat yet and crossing my fingers I won't need to buy one.
@Glitter: That birthing center sounds really great! I would be fine with going there since the hospital is so close. -
@skipra: yea. Unfortunately (? feels weird to use that word in this context?) I make way too much to ever be able to stay home. It would almost cut our income in half. I also don't think I'd enjoy staying home forever-- although a year off sounds pretty awesome! Ideally I'd love if we could afford for me to just work part time and take a pay cut to 20 or 30k/year but with my loan situation (thank you law school) and my husband currently in school (mba night program which we're paying out of pocket) there is 0 chance of that happening. I sort of hope that once my husband is done with his MBA program in 2015 he gets a promotion or new job with a big raise so we don't NEED my income so much anymore and I'd have more freedom to reduce my hours
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Question for everyone with #2 or 3 on the way - what are you doing about a crib? DD will have just turned two when this baby shows up and we don't want to buy another crib so we're planning to move her into a new bed. She sleeps so well in her crib though that I'm hesitant to move her and the new baby will stay in our room for awhile, but I've heard it is best to do it before the new baby shows up so she doesn't think the new baby "stole" her crib.
I'm just worried it is going to be a whole lot of change for her - new room, new bed, new baby..... We're also losing our guest room so that each kid can have their own room, so I've thought about just moving her straight to a bigger bed instead of a toddler bed so that we still have space for someone to stay sometimes. Thoughts?
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@Mae: I make too much to stay at home too. I actually make slightly more than DH. Honestly, I wish I could just work part time - the best of both worlds! I'm sad to think I will soon have to leave two little boys while I go to work.
@Keds: I'm moving DS to a toddler bed. He is 16 months. But he hates his crib and sleeps with us, so we are not the best example. I would have liked to move him straight to a big bed but his new room will be upstairs now and we don't want him that far away from us. The toddler bed is at the foot of our bed.
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The one-year leave thing makes so much sense! I never thought about how it could benefit the companies. If you have a full year to integrate a new person, it's actually functional, and they might actually want the position. Here, with people only taking 6-12 weeks, the team just has to be short in the meantime, because it's more hassle than help to bring someone for such a short term. How enlightened!
That said, I may just be quitting my job and praying we don't end up in a mess come May. Haven't decided yet. It's scary because we've got similar financial situation to you, @Mae: I'm really the primary earner and we have large student debt. Thinking about putting our federal loans into deferment to ease it a bit, as they take about half my post-tax income... So annoying to have to choose.
@cookie_dough: I had to read your mat leave plans about three times thinking you took negative 10d of mat leave (July 11 - Canada Day) before I realized you had more than a year. That's how amazing it is! My brain couldn't even comprehend!
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@anandam: lol me too! I was like wait that doesn't make sense and it took me 3 reads to realize she meant a YEAR. I don't know anyone in the US who has taken that long. I have ONE friend who has 18 weeks paid leave as a company benefit and it is like, unheard-of-awesome. Almost everyone I know took either 8 or 12 weeks, often at least partially unpaid.
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@Mae: Did you Google Canada Day? I did. Hahaha.
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@anandam: yep
Actually that was our first question during the session - What happens in the case of an emergency??
I'm really hoping she can be here for the birth so that she too would be in the birthing room with me keeping a close eye on things.
Thanks!!
As for baby movement, baby W has been lean on the kicks the last few days, but I do feel them every once in a while so I try not to worry. Has it been a whole day of no movement? Or just this aft?
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