Hi February moms! Welcome to the other side!! How's everybody doing?

Things are wonderful and crazy here. I had a few very emotional days at first - crying because I was happy, crying because I was sad for no reason, crying out of nostalgia for my pregnancy, just a mess! The sleep deprivation really plays with you.

It was weird at first, and I don't know why we did this, but for the first few nights, we had Derek sleeping in the living room in his pack n play round the clock. So basically I would go take naps in the bedroom after he'd feed around 11, then 1. Then DH would go to bed and I stay out in the living room nursing and "napping." Ugh! Considering he was constipated one night and then we had a rocky start to bf'ing, that meant I was getting no sleep and DH and I weren't sleeping in the same bed. So we transitioned Derek to a rock n play by our bed. Now I have a real bedtime (and so does he, to establish a rough routine) around 9, even though I'm still waking every 1.5-3 hours to nurse, and a real wake up time, and DH and I are in the same bed. And it's a step toward a new normal!

As for bf'ing, we had some latching issues (big boobs, small nipples, big areolas, small baby mouth) but with the help of our hospitals lactation consultants, countless Internet resources, and lots of mom friends, that's getting better, too. The poor initial latch made my nipples bleed which made things even worse, then my milk came in on day 4 and I got so engorged it was even harder for him to latch. I almost broke down and gave him formula and DH and I had a huge fight because I was irrational and screaming I was a bad mom because I could even feed my kid but then I decided to stop getting frustrated with Derek when he'd flail and have a hard time -- after all he's learning too! -- and then the engorgement eased up and with the help of lots of lanolin, a manual breast pump, ibuprofen and cool NUK compresses, we are starting to enjoy the experience!

Physically I'm recovering well. I had a second degree tear so I have to be careful and "wiping" with a peri bottle is weird, but it doesn't hurt to sit or move around as much,

Otherwise, motherhood is the most amazing thing! I live our little son more than I could have imagined. He's amazing and smiles in his sleep and has some alert periods and I totally hog him by letting him fall and stay asleep on me after feeding. We took a walk today in his baby carrier, and can't wait to start doing more stuff with him!

How's everybody else doing? Good, bad, ugly?